Oranges & Roses

Dreams Are Dangerous

I know what you're thinking. You didn't expect me to post again so soon. Ha! I did and that makes me awesome in my book. Especially since I'm having a biopsy done this morning. Vote, comment, make me proud! 

Chapter Nineteen

“He really did love you, you know. All the way up until the end.”

I didn’t even blink. “No he didn’t.”

He looked like he was about to slap me and then he didn’t so much as look it but did it. My cheek stung as did my hands for smacking the linoleum floor when I fell away from the hit. “All he could talk about for that whole week before he proposed was the future he had with you…”

“You mean the future he had in the drug running business?” I spat out some blood. “That would’ve been a great future.”

“Ford never talked about the future, Ari. You know that. He was a “live in the now” type of guy. Then you…wormed your way into him, making him think long term instead of short. That was dangerous and it forced him to lose sight of what was really important.”

Everyone knows that’s deadly for people in our world. Dreams were just that, something your mind came up with while you were sleeping to keep up your brain activity. They weren’t something you actively pursued in the waking world. We didn’t have dreams because we didn’t know if we would live to see the next day.

“He was talking white picket fence and dog type of shit. And then you had to go and get pregnant.”

“It’s not like I did it on purpose. I was seventeen! I wasn’t even out of high school yet…”

“You just don’t get it, do you? All you see is your side of it…”

“That’s because there is only one side of it. He didn’t want kids, hell he was a kid. We both were but I had a solution and it wasn’t to let some…doctor I found on Vice Row hack my insides to pieces.”

“He made a mistake.” Rob pressed the gun against my forehead as I stared daggers into his eyes. “He was real torn up about it…”

“He wasn’t the one overdosing and bleeding out. Don’t talk to me about how torn up your scumbag of a brother was over what he did.”

Calling Ford scum at that point was probably not the best thing, like mentioning the gunshot wound. But I couldn’t help but tell the truth and let it pour out of my mouth. Especially if I was about to get shot.

“My brother was not scum. He did what he thought was best.”

“He thought about himself, Rob. You know that. When are you going to realize that was your blood, your flesh, that he tried to kill? That baby would’ve been your niece or nephew…”

“Don’t tell me what that kid would’ve been to me because I already know. He knew it too. He knew what he did was wrong. The guilt came after but he figured it out.”

“Yeah and by that time my brother was putting a bullet into his head. Ford never thought about anyone other than himself. I told him—I told him my brother and Michelle would take the kid. There was no reason for him to do what he did. None!”

“He wasn’t about to let someone else raise his kid…”

“WELL AT LEAST THEN MY BABY WOULD BE ALIVE!”

As soon as I said it, I couldn’t believe I did. I stared at Rob wide eyed, a sheen of tears glossing my eyes. Rob was a little startled by my outburst too, so much so his hand wavered and the gun lowered a little. My own hand came up to cover my mouth.