curses

i. absence

aang walked down the palace corridor,
his eyes searching for someone through the large glass windows. the sunset was breathtaking that evening, painting the world in warm hues of orange and pink.

two weeks ago, zuko, the new firelord, had said something that worried the boy. he needed to talk to him, to help him. he would've talked to the teenager sooner if they had more time and privacy; the avatar and the firelord had many duties to attend to.

but lately, he seemed so faraway; distant with everyone, yet heavily focused on his responsibilities. he was also serious in almost every interaction and event, even in lighthearted conversation. well, the older boy was never an upbeat/people person at heart either, but something just wasn't right with his best friend.

if you ever see me turning into my father, i want you to... i want you to end me. promise me that.

promise.

how could he promise such a thing? he believed zuko would become one of the most honorable and noble leaders of all time.

a gentle breeze made aang turn around, noticing the wind had opened one of the windows. as he closed it, his eyes followed a bird flying high into the pink clouds, zipping past a figure that stood on the pinnacle of the palace.

he squinted, watching as the wind blew at the boys hair. aang smiled, and he quickly airbended his way to zuko before he lost sight of him.

"zuko!" aang landed a few feet beside him, grinning. "good evening, your fieryness," he greeted playfully with a bow.

zuko gave him a small smile. "good evening, aang"

"what're you doing up here?" aang looked into the older boys tired eyes, and remembered the serious conversation they needed to have.

"just enjoying the view," zuko answered, his eyes suddenly stern as he stared into the bruised skies.

"i've been thinking of what you told me a couple weeks ago."

zuko glanced at the younger boy, his usual lighthearted expression was now pensive.

"the promise i made to you. i don't want to break it, but i also don't want to keep it. even if it's in your legacy, i don't believe that you'll turn into your father. you're your own person, everything you've been through, all the decisions you've made, the lessons you've learned, have all made you the person you are today; a better, stronger person."

the avatar's earnest tone and honest eyes soothed zuko, and made him realize the boy was the only one who somewhat understood him. the younger boy trusted him, but deep down, zuko didn't know if he trusted himself.

"if you don't keep your promise, the world could end up in flames." zuko didn't take his eyes off the darkening horizon. his grave words dug a hole in aang's chest.

"zuko, you need to trust yourself. i know you want the best for the world; to keep everything balanced and peaceful. and i'm doing the same. we're doing this together."

but it's different for you. zuko thought.

aang didn't have a condescending father who constantly breathed down his neck, even if he were locked away from the world—who had never given him an ounce of affection, or ever will. zuko's absent mother pained him, and his relationship with his corrupted sister frustrated him.

how could he maintain peace in the fire nation if he's not even at peace with himself?

zuko turned his back to aang. "i need to find peace," he whispered to himself. a consoling breeze swept his raven hair across his forehead.

"it's getting late. you should go rest." and with that, zuko walked away.

aang stood there, downcasted, but determined to not let his friend feel alone.

"i'll help you find peace."

zuko stopped in his steps, slightly turning his head.
"goodnight, aang."

*

aang stayed in the fire nation that night. yesterday morning, katara, sokka, and suki went away to their homeland for a small vacation, and toph stayed in her metal bending academy in the earth kingdom.

zuko had reserved a special room for him, and had decorated it himself. it was warm and homely, the colors, simple decorations, and special artifacts reminding the young airbender of home. it seemed the firelord had done his research. aang smiled.

zuko's room was a few doors down, and he was awake in his bed, afraid to have another nightmare if he fell asleep.

we're doing this together.

i'll help you find peace.

aang's words and bright, determined eyes were stuck in his head. zuko remembered the last time he felt at peace, and oh how long ago it was. sitting beside his mother on the sand, watching the calm waves of the beach glittering beneath the warm, lilac sunset, and looking up to see his mother's soft smile. those memories brought tears to his eyes.

my love, everything i've done i did it to protect you.

but it also enraged him. they took his mother away from him, like cutting a thread in half. the woman who understood and reassured him, the woman who loved him for who he was ever since he was born, had been gone for much too long.

he wanted to scream, to burn down his room, to burn the person who took his mother away.

to burn the world for being so cruel.

he tore the blankets off his seething body, screaming into his pillow, causing smoke to rise from his bed.

a few doors down, the smell of smoke disturbed aang in his meditation. he frowned in concern and cautiously stepped out of his room, searching the halls for the source of smoke. somehow, the smell seemed familiar, catching him off guard.

zuko.

he quickly walked down the hall to the firelord's chambers, tendrils of smoke flooding through the cracks.

"zuko?" he gently opened the door, finding the older boy nearly smoldered on the edge of his bed, his head buried in his hands.

"zuko, what's wrong?" aang asked, worry etched on his face as he approached him.

the older boy's head shot up, teary eyes staring at the concerned boy. he quickly looked down, and he hopelessly slid to his knees, lowering his head.

"please help me." he pleaded quietly. why did he sound ashamed?

aang sat on his knees infront of zuko, his chest aching for the vulnerable teenager. "of course zuko. i'm always here for you. what's on your mind? what's troubling you?"

he looked into aang's wide, caring eyes. he found himself feeling comforted by the avatar's mere presence. the tendrils of smoke began to disappear, and zuko knew what he had to do.

"i need to find my mother."