13 Reasons Why Oneshots

See You Later // Alex Standall x Charlie St. George

Charlie didn't often feel afraid, but there was no other way to describe the pure terror that was running through his veins now. He hadn't even realized it was happening until it was too late – He and Alex and Tyler were studying together in the library. Alex stuttered his way through Spanish words and conjugations that, really, he should've known a bit better considering this was his fourth year taking the class, not to mention having Tony at his disposal for help.

            It wasn't like Charlie was complaining – He liked having an excuse to spend more time with Alex, even if it was just as his study buddy. They'd sat side by side, close enough that when Charlie leaned over to correct something on his paper, their legs brushed and lightning bolts shot up his spine. Their papers were scattered across the table, a handful of Charlie's notes arranged in front of Alex, whose own chicken scratch was impossible to decipher and of very limited use to them.

            "This is impossible. I give up," Alex groaned dramatically as he rested his head in his hands, palms digging into his eyes.

            "Hey, don't say that." Charlie took a chance, hesitating only for a second before briefly resting his hand on Alex's back to comfort him. Alex shifted, blue eyes piercing as they made eye contact.

            "You're a year below me and understand far better than I ever will. Admit it: I'm a lost cause." Charlie would do nothing of the sort, of course.

            Alex was a bundle of insecurities, of doubts and giving up before he even gave himself a chance to try, and Charlie saw the beauty in him that Alex himself was blind to. He wondered if he could convince him to see himself the way that he did if he were able to reach out and clutch his hands within his own, if he would somehow be able to transmit all of the words left unsaid merely through bodily contact.

            That wasn't an option, though – He might've been good at Spanish, and all of his classes, really – And he might've been able to balance his schedule full of Honors classes with co-captaining the football team, but he still wasn't able to get the nerve to tell Alex Standall how big of a crush he had on him.

            He hadn't even been sure if he was gay, at first – Alex was quiet. He kept to himself in a way that nobody on the team had the capacity to do, which was part of what had drawn Charlie to him in the first place. He knew that Alex had been together with Jessica in the past, before Charlie had moved there. After the Valentine's Day dance, though, he'd also heard rumors about Alex and Winston making out in the hallway, which gave him a spark of hope.

            Charlie wasn't quite out yet himself, although he wasn't opposed to the idea of being so. It was more like he was morally against the idea of having to "come out" in the first place. Straight people didn't have to go through a dramatic, uncomfortable revealing of their sexuality to everyone that they knew, so why should he have to? Charlie always just assumed that eventually, he would get a boyfriend, and then everyone would know.

            Now, though, on a certain level, he almost wished that he wasn't so passionate about giving a massive "fuck you" to society's rules. He was living under the constant assumption from others that he was straight, including from the guys he liked. Would Alex be more likely to realize that Charlie was flirting and not just being kind and thoughtful if he knew? Would knowing enlighten them to new opportunities, or would it simply make Alex uncomfortable in his presence?

            It was tempting to jump the gun and just tell him, and then deal with the consequences afterwards, no matter what they may be. While Charlie was fearless on the field, however, he was a little more cautious when it came to love.