Akenya

let's keep it a secret

- 8. LET'S KEEP IT A SECRET -

After re-reading some economics notes in the morning, I got dressed,  deciding to wear a floral dress and small-heeled pumps. Am I dressing up for Munroe? Maybe a little. But also to make me feel more confident for mock exams this week.

I was kind of scared because I'd never been in a relationship before. Human connection is a tricky thing. But I was also really excited. The surreal feelings of reciprocated love made me feel like a shooting star.

"See you mum!" My dad had already gone off to work and my mum was sleeping under the covers on the couch. She hadn't been speaking to me recently and she keeps on eating late at night. I frowned at the thought that she's getting worse and prayed that she got better soon.

-

Two hours later, I came out of the exam hall quickly, blocking out anyone who talked about the econ test. There's nothing worse than feeling like you've fucked up before you've even gotten the test back.

A familiar voice piped up.

"So how did it go?" Munroe's presence instantly calmed me. His hair was fluffier than usual and he was leaning against the radiator near the canteen, with his phone in his hands.

"It could have gone worse. It could have gone better." I sighed. "What about Geography? Did you finish the paper?"

"Yes. It was actually pretty good." We walked side-by-side and I could tell some people were looking at us weirdly.

"Have you...told anyone about us?"

"Nope. Not even Samuel. Unless you want me too?" He opened one of the doors for me and I definitely saw a girl gasp from the side. So dramatic...

"Yeah I think we should keep it a secret for now. You know how people are like."

He nodded but I could tell we weren't on the same page. Knowing Munroe, he would be happy to spread the word. But the last time there was a couple, they were relentlessly teased.  Even the teachers knew about Jessica and Rodriguez. In the end, they broke up and never spoke again.

"But are you gonna tell Nea and Shazzlyn?"

"Hmm. Yeah. I'll just have to find the right time. In that case you can tell your friends. It wouldn't be fair otherwise."

There was a period of awkward silence. It was still weird to think that Munroe was my boyfriend. I wondered if it would be like this in the future too.

"Are you feeling a bit awkward now? If I'm honest, this is my first time being a relationship so all my knowledge comes from anime."

"Literally same." We giggled and the nerves cooled for a while.

-

"Shazzlyn!" After grabbing some unseasoned food from the canteen. We had a revise and chat sesh. It was extremely empty as the rest of the year groups had classes. I loved the concept of study leave.

"So this morning when I was doing my Design and Technology exam, my chair kept on making this squeaky sound, so it sounded like I was farting. Oh my gosh, it was so embarrassing and annoying."

I laughed so hard that I started wheezing. "You poor thing! Hun, you could have told the teacher and used that excuse to get the window seat."

The window seat was the best position to be during an exam. You can't get too overwhelmed because there's a breeze coming in and the direct sunlight brightens your mood. It's a guarantee for a better grade.

As we continued chatting about some embarrassing exam hall moments, I got a text.

hi gf

uhm way to make it obvious

now i'm starting to think you don't wanna date me :(

ofc i do cutie🙄

too much?

too little! 🤑🤑 call me sexy not cute... im not a stuffed animal

BUT YOU ARE! u r v v cute to me

what do i have to do to make you call me sexy...

u have to be chris evans and i don't think that's possible

waaaaa

see!! that is so so cute. anyways what were u typing before?

  so since we can't be together in public

wanna meet up tomorrow b4 school? 

sure let's say 8am if I wake up early enough

ok i gtg. doin some maths revision with Shazz now 

I contemplated whether to send a heart emoji or if that was too forward.  But Roe beat me to it.

💖💖 good luck ake see you tomorrow

I smiled at my phone, excited for tomorrow's adventures.

-

Dinner was cooking for me and my mum as my dad had a late shift today.

It was therapeutic. I made some lasagna with mushrooms to replace the meat. Being a weekday vegetarian meant that I could eat whatever I wanted on weekends but stuck to a vegetarian diet on the weekdays.

I had the sudden urge to stalk Munroe's social media as I waited for the mushrooms to boil. I already had him on insta but he never posted anything.

Tapping on his tagged pictures, I found an image that upsetted me a tad. It was him and Claudia at some golf course about a year and a half ago. Urgh. Her again. I closed insta and went back to cooking. I mean, I shouldn't be jealous of an ex-crush right?

But I was. She was gorgeous and she literally lived next door to Munroe. I really needed to talk to Shazzlyn and Nea.

"Guys. I have big news."

"Spill. Now." Nea shouted over the phone.

"So me and Munroe are kind of dating..."

A series of screams were heard over the phone. Shazzlyn started singing, "I told you so! Nea you owe me a tenner."

For the next half an hour, I updated them on all that had happened and they listened tentatively. Shazzlyn thought that I was just overthinking about Claudia and that I should focus on the now not the past. It's the advice I needed to hear and I was grateful to have them in my life.

"You guys are the best." I was close to sobbing. I was overwhelmed with emotions, that I needed to let out.

We ended the call and I sat on my bed and cried for a while. It's healthy to cry at least once a week apparently. And thinking how much life had changed in just a few weeks - it was very necessary.