The Unwanted Promise (New Cover, Same Story)

02. The Unwanted Promise

Bee guides me to the passenger side of the car and opens the door for me. Carefully, he makes sure I am in the seat before closing the door behind me. Then he waits as if still unsure if I would have any thoughts of jumping out.

He didn't know me though, and if he did he would have known that I wouldn't back down from my words. Sighing, I reluctantly buckled myself up, letting him know I wasn't going anywhere. When I was done, I sat quietly, waiting for him to get in and drive me away from the house I grew up in.

I stared at the house I just stepped out of. Despite the turmoil that may be happening in the confined walls, the outside of it was calm. Its steady state was bidding me good bye.

As much as I would have liked to say that I knew myself well, I must have not known myself at all. As soon as Bee left the passenger side door, making his way to the driver seat, I wanted to jump out. I wanted to run, step after step, farther away from this life I was going into.

In all honesty, who wouldn't want to run away in my position? This was no way to lead a life. Everything about this was wrong. Pulling and pushing someone, without their consent, into a whole different world should be illegal. I was bubbling with frustrations, and it was only building.

Even with thoughts of running away, anger pounding into me, and fantasies of ripping heads off, I sat still. There was nothing I could do to make my situation easier. I could run, but I would have to deal with the humiliations. I would have to deal with the embarrassment I caused my family, my parents. And that was one thing I could never do. I could deal with them disowning me right away, but their words against my parents would haunt me for life.

In a way I hate myself. My own parents were the people who gave me away without my consent and here I was, silently defending their title. For people who didn't care about me as a human being I cared too much about their reputation. But I couldn't back down from who I was. And before I was to be this man's wife, I was my parents' daughter. It didn't even matter if they were throwing me into the tiger's pit. I would have walked in willingly if they had told me beforehand.

Trails of tears flowed down my face. I couldn't control them. I knew it wouldn't be the last cry of the day. There was still meeting this new family. There was still spending the first night in a new environment. How would I survive?

I didn't know how my sisters could do it. They decided to marry and leave everything they knew behind. They decided to become part of another family. Was love that powerful, that it could make you step into a new life?

Thinking of love only made more tears trickle down. Of course love was that powerful.

It was funny, and I wanted to chuckle at how my life was turning out. But my laughter turned to sobs and I had to hide my face. I was so set on moving out of my parent's house. I was ready to tell my parents and to sign a lease. I was ready to leave everything I knew and venture into a new part of my life.

Here I was doing just that, and I wanted nothing more than to run back home. I wanted to hug my parents, my siblings, my blankets, and never let go.

Calming myself down, I wiped the tears out of my eyes. My face was damp still, but I didn't bother with it. Tears were still making their way down. It was never ending. I wanted them to stop, but nothing I said to myself was working. I scolded myself, told myself that everything was okay, told myself that I could cry later, but it only made my situation worse. Another round of sobs was coming and I had to hold it in. Taking in deep breaths and slowly letting them out finally did it. I was able to control myself for a little while.

Bee opened the driver side door and sat down. I looked forward, not letting him get the better of me. He would never get to see my weakness anymore. From that moment on, he was my enemy. This man took my life away, the put a knife to my neck and sliced it without hesitation. I paid him no attention, yet he sighed and looked over to me.