Strawberry Milk - Jeonglix

11

"Sit in the living-room," Rose said and Jeongin obliged, following the route he knew led to the living-room but even something as simple as that started to feel strange. He saw everything through a distorted lens and his thoughts were racing too quickly for him to catch onto any of them.

Seungmin was called into the room and he sat on the sofa beside Jeongin, immediately noticing that something was wrong. He was zoned out, but it was worse than usual, like it was when he got stressed. "Are you ok? Did something happen?" Seungmin asked but didn't get a response as Rose walked into the room, Justin following behind her.

"What's wrong?" He asked his wife. Seungmin wanted an answer to that question too.

"Jeongin and Seungmin lied to us," she accused and Seungmin realised she must have caught Jeongin coming home. He looked over at him again, but he was still staring blankly at the floor as if he was oblivious to everything around him. "I found Jeongin getting off the bus but he wouldn't tell me where he went."

"Is that true?" Justin asked, eyes landing on Jeongin who turned his head at the question but didn't answer. He was staring at Justin as if he couldn't quite make out what was happening. Had he asked a question?

"It's true but please don't be mad," Seungmin interjected, "it's my fault, I'm the one who lied to you. Jeongin didn't have anything to do with it. I knew he didn't want to come with me on the youth club trip so I... I gave him some money to get the bus home. He must have got lost on his way to the bus stop, that's why he's late home." Seungmin couldn't believe how confidently the lie left his lips.

"Is that true, Jeongin?" Rose asked.

Jeongin managed to nod but not much else. His world around him was still a blur, almost unreal- no, definitely unreal. Jeongin didn't believe anything around him was real anymore.

"Well, why didn't you say that then?" Rose rolled her eyes. Seungmin was surprised she believed him. He knew he was the most trustworthy of the foster children, but he didn't think he'd get away with blatant lies. "I'm not happy you didn't tell me when you got home Seungmin, but I'll let it slide as you're usually both so good."

Seungmin nodded and got to his feet as Rose and Justin went their own ways. Jeongin remained where he was sitting, blinking twice as he looked at Seungmin, or rather, through him. "Innie, what's wrong?" Seungmin asked, kneeling down in front of him and placing his hands on his knees, "does it feel bad again?"

"I don't know," Jeongin whispered, so much quieter than usual, "this isn't...it doesn't feel real."

"Where's your soldier?"

Jeongin opened his hand that he'd balled up into a fist, showing Seungmin the plastic toy he relied on whenever things got too much. It was a token, a symbol of reality that helped bring him back most times.

"Is he helping?" Seungmin asked but Jeongin shook his head. "It's ok, I promise you everything is real. Come with me," he said, taking hold of Jeongin's free hand and leading him in the direction of their shared bedroom. Seungmin's touch eased him a little, but not enough to help. He felt so disconnected.

When they reached their room, Seungmin led Jeongin to his bottom bunk where he lay down in between his three stuffed animals and multiple pillows. He closed his eyes but he already felt like he was lost in a dream.

"You'll talk to your therapist about this on Monday, won't you, Innie?" Seungmin asked, sitting on the edge of his bed and gnawing at his bottom lip.

Jeongin replied with a brief nod and Seungmin sighed, grabbing the blanket from the end of the bed and draping it over his body. He placed Snowy under one of Jeongin's arms and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "Try and get some sleep. I'm sure everything will be ok in the morning."