𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 ℂ𝕒𝕟'𝕥 𝕋𝕒𝕜𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝔸𝕨𝕒𝕪 •𝕁𝔽𝕂•

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 28 - ᴘᴇɴᴀɴᴄᴇ

"Joanna, you have been here all day long, this is not good for you and the baby, you need rest," Bobby said to me softly but I wasn't listening. I was sitting outside the trauma room, staring at the ceiling numbly. "That's it, I'm taking you home, Caroline and John need their mother, alright." Bobby roughly grabbed me by arm, in the intention that I would resist but I didn't. Like a lifeless corpse, I let him pull me up to my feet.

He walked me out down the corridor, strong with the smell of disinfectant and blood where my Secret Service agent Richard stood. I walked with them with my head lowered out through the back door of the hospital until I was sitting in the back of a car and Bobby got in next to me.

"Bobby, what if Jack n-never wakes up? What happens to me? I can't live without him Bobby, he - he has to wake up." I mumbled to Bobby, barely audible and he just kept looking at me in a passive stare. "We cannot lose hope, Joanna, we cannot give up. Jack is going to fight this, he will fight this." I heard Bobby say and I sighed, falling back against the backrest of the car as the silhouette of the hospital vanished behind me.

***

It had been twenty four hours since I had seen the bullet pierce into my husband's flesh, twenty four hours since I had last heard his voice. I sat in my bed, both my children sleeping next to me on either of my sides. I had slept for a few hours, probably three to four hours but had woken up abruptly to a bone chilling nightmare.

I crept out of bed with my hand on my stomach and grabbed the telephone receiver. Within seconds, someone at the George Washington University Hospital picked up.

"I need to speak to Attorney General Robert Kennedy please." I said softly.

"Ma'am, please hold the line, I'll inform him."

Five minutes later, a heavy, drowsy voice reached me through the phone.

"Joanna."

"Bobby, I couldn't sleep. Hell, I want to come over, please. I want to be with my husband." I whispered softly, toying with the fabric of my flowy night dress. There was a long pause on the other end of the phone and finally I heard Bobby exhale.

"It's 3 am, Joanna, I know you are worried but I am here with him. Why don't you get some sleep and tomorrow you can come over?" His voice sounded strained and tired and I nodded slowly sliding the receiver down my ear and back in its place. I crawled back in bed and pulled John and Caroline closer to my body, curling into them, trying to fight the haunting thoughts to stop invading my already disheveled mind but it wasn't working.

I sat up abruptly in bed, rubbing circles over my baby bump as I started feeling uneasy. I had brought this upon us. Tears sprang into my eyes and I looked down at the children. For my jealousy, my husband was paying a price. I couldn't stop thinking about the last time I was standing by the river, casually watching my own command being followed. I had killed an innocent soul and an unborn baby. This was happening because of me. Jack was suffering because of my actions.

The next morning, I was already dressed by 7 am in whatever I could lay my hands on. I didn't care what I wore, I just needed to go back to Jack. I left my sleeping children in my bed with their nanny and waddled out towards the Executive Office to speak with Rita. However, I decided to take a little detour and go to the Oval Office. I reached the Oval Office, I was surprised when I saw that the door was thrown open. I poked my head in and saw Lyndon sitting on Jack's desk, writing something.

My nostrils flared in anger and my fists clenched against my sides. I briefly shut my eyes and tried to calm myself when Lyndon looked up and saw me by the door.

"Mrs. Kennedy, come in, please." He said in a gruff tone.

Swallowing my anger, I walked inside with a fake, dead smile against my lips.