Lifeline

Chapter 48; Baby.

Shards of glass, the blood, the pain, my feet stuck...

And...

The pain...  Too much pain...

I had to protect my baby...

"Mommy, let's go..."

Emily....

"Kendra don't do this..."

But the water was so cold...

I will come back when the pain is gone...

For my baby...

My baby...

My head throbbed, I used my hands to hold my head but it didn't help.

My baby...

I took my hands off my head and placed them on my tummy.

Then I remembered something...

"She lost the baby."

Who lost their baby?

Because I definitely didn't lose mine.

"Calm down, Miss..."

How?

"I'm going to need you all to leave the room so we can stabilize the patient..."

Stabilize the patient?!

What did this doctor think of me...

Okay, sure...

Maybe I was hyperventilating, but, this wasn't that bad right...

It was just like the time I was at the hospital after Luke had beaten me up.

The doctor's said they stabilized me.

Each and every time.

They stabilized me.

But that was what they thought.

To me, they traumatized me.

Wasn't that how I got royally fucked in the first place?

I looked around the room again.

I saw the fear very clear on all their faces.

They expected me to do it again.

They expected me to shut them out again.

They expected me to mourn for my child in the way they knew I did best.

I saw disappointment on their faces.

They thought I was going to fall back.

But I was disappointed more.

They saw me like anyone did a drug addict.

One who quits only to fall back when things get hard.

And I was disappointed they couldn't see, I had put that Kendra behind me.

"I am not doing this again..." I whispered to no one in particular.

"I was pregnant, I had an accident, I lost my baby." I stated.

I accepted what had happened.

"I just want to sleep now..."

I then looked at them again.

I had a very shocked doctor in front of me.

And I understood.

One minute I'm hyperventilating and the next, I'm speaking randomly.