paradise [byakuya togami x fem! reader]

iv. strange

[author's note: hi! thank you so much to everyone who's been voting for and reading my story!! it seriously means the world me and motivates me to keep writing!! btw, the chapters following this one are gonna really exciting! i have fun things planned so, stay tuned! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) ]

     "Togami, h-have you ever had a crush on anyone?" The words tumbled out of your mouth.
     He stopped in his tracks and showed you an expression you've never seen out of him. He looked.. flustered? You didn't really know that heirs to billion dollar conglomerates could ever be flustered.
     His eye's widened, his brows twitched, and you could see his cheeks faintly turn red. Honestly, it was kind of cute seeing him show a real human emotion other than disgust for once. In that moment, Byakuya became more of a human human to you.
     You weren't really sure why this question embarrassed him so much. I mean, you kind of expected that he would just be a little shocked by your question and call you stupid for asking it. Why is he reacting like this? There was obviously a reason, but you couldn't figure it out.
     "Why do you keep asking me such i-idiotic questions?!" He asked. He stuttered. Wow. His face was still red. As embarrassed you were too for saying something so dumb, you couldn't help but smile at him. You felt weird. Byakuya, silen stoic stone statue, had suddenly turned human.
    "I-I'm sorry, I was just kinda, y'know, curious," you explained.
     He rolled his eyes at you. "As if that's a good reason."
     "It's the truth! I'm seriously wondering if someone as serious as you has the capacity to get feelings for someone," You explained.
     "Well, of course I do, I'm human after all," He said.
     "Well, then, answer my damn question!" You urged.
     "Well, the obvious answer is no. I don't have the time or desire to waste my life away worrying about affection. I don't even know what it's like to have a "crush"," He explained. As he did so, for some reason he couldn't maintain eye contact with you.
     "Woah for someone who's so "intelligent" I'm surprised you don't know what it's like to have a crush on someone! Can I explain it to you?" You offered.
     He rolled his eyes and sighed. His usual flat and annoyed expression returned to his face. "Fine. There's no point in saying no to you because I know you'll just continue to annoy me about it."
     "Okay, well, it's sort of like... constantly being drawn to someone. You want to be around them all the time, and when you're apart, you find yourself unable to stop thinking about them," You described, feeling a bit awkward while doing so, "They're almost always on your mind, even in the morning right when you wake up and late at night when you're lying in your bed. It's a really confusing feeling.  When you and your crush are together, you just feel so inexplicably happy." However, something odd happened. As you continued with this explanation to him, you felt your face heat up and butterflies start whirling around in your face.
    You were confused. 'Why do I feel so weird?' you mentally asked yourself. 'Maybe it's just because it's embarrassing to explain crushes to a boy,'
     Byakuya looked off in the distance as if he was actually thinking about what you said. He seemed to actually be interested in your words, which was weird for him to do. "I see," he said. "It sounds like you're speaking from experience."
     "Well, of course I am. It's normal for people like me to get crushes on people pretty often."
"That's idiotic," He said bluntly.
"I know, but once you get a crush on someone you just.. can't really help it." You explained.

Byakuya's POV
Byakuya's heart was racing. He didn't know why he felt so... odd. He felt all flustered and confused for no apparent reason. He began to grow frustrated with his own emotions.
He decided to just continue walking with
Y/N in silence so he had time to think. She gave him a somewhat confused look, but it seems that she decided she should just stay quiet too.
He looked at the ocean waves and watched the waves gently crash onto the shore. 'What's wrong with me?' he thought to himself.
He tried to figure out what this emotion he kept feeling was. It felt similar to fear and excitement all at once. Before he came to this island, he never really felt it before. Now that he thought about it, he only really felt this way when Y/N was around
Y/N. Maybe she's probably just pisses him off so much that he had to feel a new emotion for it. Yeah. That's it. She just.. pisses him off.
Then, he thought about what you had said earlier about what it means to have a crush. He quickly put two and two together.
'No, it can't be. I've barely known her a day and all she does is piss me off.' He mentally decided. 'Absolutely not.' However, he still felt unconvinced.

Your POV
     You guessed that Byakuya has stopped talking to take a moment to think. That's fine. You needed that, too. When you looked over at him, he looked really frustrated. Jeez, everything is so weird today. Why was he acting like this? What's going on inside of his head? You sighed a little.
     You thought back on why the two of you had gotten so flustered when you started talk about crushes. 'Does this mean something?' you wondered. However, the idea of you or Byakuya feeling anything more than dislike for each other was absolutely preposterous. 'No.' you decided. 'There's no way. It's just... not like that.'
     Just when the silence between you two grew unbearable, you looked over at him. Right in that moment, he was turning to look at you at the exact same time. You planned on saying something but you forgot what it was. Both of your bewildered and emotionally-frustrated eyes locked in silence for a moment. The world went quiet. You started to get butterflies.
     You tore your Y/E/C eyes away quickly. You were starting to feel weird. As you did so, he finally broke the silence. "I need to go back now."
     You looked back at him again. "Why? There's still so much of the day left."
     "I don't need a reason. I've let you waste my time for long enough. You can stay out here and do whatever, but I want to head back," he explained.
     "But.. you still have 19 more questions to answer!"
     "That doesn't matter. Just... save them for later," He said before turning around and briskly beginning to walk in the direction of the hotel.
     "Um, I'll see you tonight, maybe!" You called after him as he grew increasingly farther away. He didn't respond or acknowledge you.
     "What's with this guy.." you whispered to yourself.

     Hours had passed. The sun had dissolved into horizon and in its place, white stars sprinkled the sky. You were just now getting back to the suite. Admittedly, you were dreading going back. Things felt more awkward and tense with Byakuya than they had before. You were avoiding him.
     You slowly opened the door, praying that he wouldn't be there when you did it. Of course, he wasn't. In a suite this big, it's almost a challenge to run into another person here.
     You sighed a relieved sigh, deciding you should just wash the dishes and clean whatever mess had been made in your absence. However, you kept in mind to avoid the library and Byakuya's room.
     After all your work was done, you felt that you should go to sleep. It wasn't that late, only about 10 pm, but you were physically and especially emotionally exhausted. Today was a really weird day.
     Once you were in bed, you rolled on your side and stared out the window. The view was gorgeous, but it couldn't compare to the one from Byakuya's room, of course.
     As you shut your eyes, something frustrating happened. Your head grew cloudy and hazy with thoughts of Byakuya. You sighed. 'Why am I thinking about him right now? That's annoying. I just want to go to sleep.' Just then, your words from earlier came back.
   "When you're apart, you find yourself unable to stop thinking about them. They're almost always on your mind, even in the morning right when you wake up and late at night when you're lying in your bed"
     You opened your eyes in surprise. In that moment, you thought of all the times you felt weird around him, when you got excited to talk to him, and the weird butterfly feeling you get when he'd look you in the eyes. This memories rushed into your head. They all seemed to point to one thing. Everything made sense now.
     Your eyes widened in shock. You actually didn't believe it. It couldn't be true. All you could do was exhale the word,
"Fuck."