I am 1D's

Thearphy

As I was putting the furniture into the truck I went into my mothers and fathers old bedroom. I grabbed my mothers old Jewry box and my fathers old watch there was also a hold bunch of my old family photos witch i had just enough strength to grab. When I got back I ordered the mover guy to move the sofa into the living room and I took all of the furniture out. but the and the
stools under the bench in the kitchen/bar, my big table to do art on, my little keyboard in the corner of of the bedroom, drum set and guitar. I also had a microphone. i had a little stage to sing/perform on. I panties the walls all a dark purple and left the fire place the nice bricks it was. I then went outside and fixed the garden up and the path back to the house. I used for the path some gravel and put some lovely rose bushes in different colors. I also had a few other different types of plants. I cleaned up the windows and painted them a nice white same with the front door. I also but a chain lock on in the inside of the house and a lock on the door, with that I but a nock thing on the door And they were all in gold. once I had finished I went back up to the house and it was quite late at night. When I got up there the boys were all at the dinner table eating a roast. 'finished the house sweetie?' 'Yes it looks very nice.' 'Thats good.' I sat at the dinner table and Louise but a meal in front of my and I pushed it away. 'Hun, I need you to please eat this.' 'I am not hungry at all.' 'Lilly I want ask you again.' He told me deepening his voice. I looked at the plate in front of me and it was very small, only 1 potato and some chicken. I moved the fork to wards the plate and picked up a bit of chicken and moved it towards my mouth and popped it in. chewing very slowly. Everyone gave me a smile and kept eating. 'Um listen sweetie you know we all love you and care right?' 'Yeah, what's this about?' 'Well we are putting you through therapy.' My heart stopped. 'What!' 'Yes, you are starting tomorrow.' 'You can forget about it! I'll have nothing to do with it!' With that I threw my fork gave them all dirties and walked to the front door and slammed it shut. I went for a walk to the garden and grabbed my jumper from the granny flat and climbed up onto the roof and sat there looking at the bright moon. simmering down onto the water. 'I can't go through therapy again, not from last time.' I sat my head in my lap and cried. I could hear someone walking towards me and sat down next to me. 'why don't you want to go through therapy love? 'Harry it really doesn't matter. 'If your hurting Hun then tell me, I like to help. 'Harry you now I used to have a best friend. We would do everything together and she was the only one that new about everything I had to go through so she would always make me sleep over her house to try and save me from the abuse. Then one day she felt sick and she went to the hospital and we gave her a test and it came back positive for cancer. Only a few mouths past and she died. that was the main reason I became so suicidel Harry. she is the main reason why I am so hurt and I try to kill myself and also started self harming. I can't make any new friends cause she is the only one that I care about.' I had tears running down the sides of my face. 'Well just think if she was still hear would she like to see you in this pain for life or would she like you to get help?' I thought that through. over and over again. 'No she would like me to get help but she would be there next to me holding my hand telling me they were all wrong. that there the fucked up ones and that she cares and then.. Ah! You just don't get it Harry!' 'Sweetie she's still there. she will always be, just because you can't see her with your eyes dosent mean she isn't there caring any less then she did when she was alive and if you need someone to tell you that they care there's us boys. we would all do anything just to make you happy and to make you smile for real again. Hun you can't see her with your eyes anymore. that's the thing about the dead, you can only see them with your heart and mind.' I just looked away him in amazement and jumped into his arms and hugged him and he hugged me back. rocking me back and forth, rubbing my head and whispering it's gonna be okay beautiful. After about and hour and an half we jumped of the roof and I slept on the Lange with Harry in the granny flat. in the morning I woke up and woke Harry up and we walked back up to the house were I showered and got ready. I went into the therapy room and was in the for about and hour and an half. when we were finished I caught a bus and trim home. they boys didn't know but next week is my big 15 birthday..