Better Than Me

Chapter 28

Dan really wished he could wash his hair, too, as it was falling in his face and staying there unless he pushed it back off of his forehead. It was starting to curl again, which made it even more difficult to keep in one place.

As minutes passed by, he found more things to wish he could do. Repaint his nails, for one, because they were chipping. Another was to listen to some music, and then he thought about pulling Phil's university hoodie over his head, which led to him wishing he could see Phil.

It would be nice if they could skip over the apologies and hesitance and just go back to normal. Dan didn't want to have to face him and have to hold back from giving him a huge hug and a sweet kiss, or have their first conversation in a long time be about the fight, and especially didn't want to be confronted by Phil about why he ended up in the hospital.

Luckily, though, Meghan arrived soon enough.

She had on the same pair of huge hoop earrings and a bunch of bracelets like the day before, which Dan was beginning to become rather fond of.

Meghan took him on a walk around the hallways as they discussed his dreams and how he was feeling. Dan actually talked, but avoided eye contact and tried to ignore the pain in his legs from hobbling around.

"Are you ready?" Meghan asked once Dan was sat back down in bed.

Dan slid back under the sheets. "For what?"

"I'm going to call Phil's mum," Meghan said, "Unless you've changed your mind?"

Quickly, Dan shook his head.

"What's her name, Dan?"

"Kathryn Lester."

"Okay. I'm going to call her."

Dan envied how she was able to call her without seeming anxious in the slightest. He picked at the skin around his thumb, completely silent as he listened to the dial tone, then her voice. Phil's mum's voice.

"Good evening, may I talk to Mrs. Lester? This is her? Oh lovely. I hope I'm not calling at a bad time, but I need to chat with you about something important, do you have a few minutes? You do? Perfect."

As Dan continued to pick his nails, he listened to Meghan introduce herself, explain where she was from, and why she was calling. She used Dan's name a few times, informing her of what had happened, what Dan had tried to do, all that—hearing her summarize everything sort of set it in stone for Dan. It had all really happened in the same timeline as Dan's secret and his Tesco job and his relationship with Phil.

The phone didn't pick up much of what Kath was saying but she did sound concerned, her tone melancholy and serious. She agreed to contact Phil, and right when Meghan was about to wrap up their call, Dan heard her ask a question.

"Is he alright, now, though?"

Sighing, Dan gestured to Meghan that he didn't want to speak with her. Not yet, anyway, he needed time to think of what to say. How to apologize.

"He's alright, he's being taken care of by plenty of hospital staff as well as myself and we are making sure he is safe, so there's no need to worry, Mrs. Lester. He'll be even better by the time he can be discharged, but I'll let you know he really does not want to go back home to his parents—I'm afraid they're not very helpful in this situation. But hopefully we can work out something for him soon. Thank you for letting me speak to you today..."

Dan needed something quick, because he was starting to feel really overwhelmed again—he was so thankful and felt like he had been saved because Kath had picked up, but also so guilty and like he was a burden. He thought irrationally—it would be easier on the Lesters if he wouldn't have failed. He deserved to be in the morgue, not the hospital bed, and Phil deserved a happy day doing whatever he wanted when Dan could be picked up, not having to take the time to come rescue him.