𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐒 • 𝐉𝐄𝐍𝐙𝐈𝐄

0.90

I mulled over everything for a long time. It wasn't until the water began to run cold when I finally jerked back into my body, promptly stopped crying and got out. I dried myself furiously with a towel, making my skin red in an attempt to stop feeling sorry for myself, and sneaking into Johnny's drawers, stole a semi-normal outfit. When I was dressed, I schooled my features into a smile, wiped at my bloodshot eyes and took a deep, calming breath before walking out to the kitchen.

Even from the hallway I could smell the pancakes Johnny was cooking. Couple that with the laughter and excited exclamations from the kids, and I knew that they were having fun. I tried to smile again, but when I heard both kids collapse into giggles it turned real.

"Mommy!" Brea exclaimed, pointing to a pile of multicoloured pancakes as I walked in.

I laughed at the sight, taking in the kitchen. Johnny had managed to keep the kitchen relatively tidy while cooking breakfast, but the kids had gone crazy with the food colouring. It had dyed their hands, stained their tounges, and they had chunks of different coloured pancakes resting on their plates; bright pink, a pale green, a dark blue.

"I did the green ones," Max told me proudly.

I ruffled his hair. "I'm so proud, you did a great job Maxy-boy."

"My pink ones are prettier," Brea boasted, and I laughed and rolled my eyes.

Johnny's eyes sought out my own. "Morning," His voice cracked and he gave me a small smile.

I blushed at his obvious nervousness and squeezed his hand under the bench where the kids couldn't see. "Good morning."

"Good shower?" I could see him surveying my face and probably noticing my bloodshot eyes from crying.

"It went cold," I wrinkled my nose.

He chuckled. "You're okay though?" Almost absentmindedly, his hand brushed my hair behind my ear.

I nodded genuinely. "Okay now. I got it out. Can we chat after breakfast?"

He nodded. "Of course. By the way, I saved you some normal coloured pancakes. Didn't think you'd appreciate having a brightly coloured mouth for the rest of the day."

I giggled, and this time I blushed. "Thank you."

When I'd finished eating, Johnny and I ran round trying to get the kids ready. It was the most I'd ever seen us act like actual parents in each others company. Exasperated, Johnny was trying to get Max to brush his teeth, but Max was arguing that he liked having a green mouth, and I was desperately trying not to giggle while being stern. Brea then burst into tears because she'd felt sick from eating too much, so I picked her up to whisk her off to the bathroom, only for her to vomit all over me and Johnny's shirt. So, now smelling like puke, I went and sat down with her while we sat next to the toilet, however she wanted both Johnny and I with her. So Johnny gave up the green-mouth battle with Max, parked him in front of a movie and came to sit next to me on the cold-tiled floor of the bathroom.

"You smell great," He said to me, easing down onto the floor and pulling a goofy face at Brea.

"Don't I always," I replied sarcastically, making him chuckle.

It was silent for a while as we both waited to see whether Brea needed to be sick again. She seemed to be fine, just startled if anything.

"How did you do this for five years, alone?" He marvelled.

"Love. And determination."

He smiled softly. "It's my turn, now. You go get changed. I can stay."