KILLING DARKNESS

Chapter 2: The Face

     "Aaaa!.."
     Hayal pulled out of her sleep with a sudden shock. She looked around for a few seconds to understand where she is. She was in her room. Zeynep was standing next to her bed with her hands on her waist. Like it wasn't enough for her to throw a pillow to her face while she is sleeping, she was also yelling. The headache she had was already unbearable itself. She could've even killed her to shut her up.
     "Idiot! What were you thinking you were doing last night? You've embarrassed us both. And do you know how much I've worried about you? I've called you a million times but you didn't even answer. It's a miracle that you are here. A miracle! I can't believe this."
     "Please shut up. Your voice is about to explode my head. You are annoying me."
     "I am annoying you? You should've thought that before getting drunk. Do you want to be like before?"
     She threw the same pillow back to Zeynep. Then she ignored her and went back to her sleep. "Do whatever you want," she said and left the room. She knew that she was doing all these just because she was concerned about her. But her absence was the thing she needed at that moment. That's why she decided to leave the apologies to later. The headache didn't let her sleep. Therefore she left the bed only to take a painkiller.
     After returning, she kept turning inside the bed. A little later, her mind went back to the night before. The last thing she was remembering was the moment she pushed Barış and left. When the thought of him came to her, the anger followed it. Why would he had to be everywhere she goes? He was managing to annoy her every time. Why was he making everything harder? In fact, she had thought that he was quite charming when they first met.
     He was a surgical assistant at the hospital that Zeynep was working. At that time, Zeynep kept talking about how all the girls from the hospital were admiring him. Hayal was thinking her friend was exaggerating. But when she met him, she thought her friend was right and even she wasn't giving him enough credit. Those two had met at the hospital when she went there to meet Zeynep. His perfect appearance was caught her unguarded. Even with five minutes' talk, she figured he wasn't an ordinary man. She was agreeing to Zeynep's endless talks about him. He was the prince from every women's dream. That's why she wished for him to find someone who deserves him.
     The next day, when Zeynep came home, she made her worse than to beat her 'cause her dear doctor had asked her if Hayal has a boyfriend or not. Even if she had a mature personality, she couldn't stop herself from feeling jealous and disappointed. That mature side of her was telling her that it's a good thing. Of course, not for herself. After that night she went to her friend and told her: "He is a big chance for you. I know that after all those things you've been through, it's hard for you to trust someone, and he is the most sensitive guy I've ever seen. I mean, if you want I am willing to completely forget about him. Well, there are limited people in the world who could stand you, but I have the potential to be loved by everyone." Hayal laughed at it until she lost her breath. It was fun. Because she was right. But she had given up on relationships long ago. Like Zeynep said; after the things she's been through it was hard to trust someone.
     When she asked her about what she should say to Barış, she answered: "Tell him that I am not interested." Zeynep was shocked because of her response. After some -kind of- light swearing she said: "Any women who are in their right minds wouldn't stay indifferent to Barış's interest." Hayal told her that she wasn't someone who is in her right mind. And she knew she was right.
     Barış who isn't used to get rejected couldn't accept her answer easily. He pressured Zeynep on the purpose of learning Hayal's past. After the things he's learned, he decided that her rejection was because of her distrust and fragility. From that day he started to suffocate her with his increasing attention. His purpose was to show her his sincerity, seriousness and his difference. But even after five months, he couldn't understand that he should give up because there was no hope for him.

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     She fell asleep between those thoughts. When she woke up her headache was gone. She looked at the time. It was almost three pm. She was used to waking up in the middle of the day or while the day was about end.
     When she got up, she looked for Zeynep but she wasn't at home. She was probably at work or with her friends. Because she was a nurse, trying to understand her working schedule was tiring for her. She wanted to make it up to her just in case, but she had to wait for it. At least, she wasn't going to have to hear her complains about the other night and Barış himself.
     The phone rang. She grimaced because of the caller's id. She looked up and shouted: "Life, why do you hate me this much!?" Then she declined it. Half a minute later, the phone started to ring again. She was about to turn it off but she heard the sound of an incoming message.
     "If you think for us to talk in person is better then I can be there in a minute." The phone rang again. This time she answered without waiting. Because she definitely didn't want to talk to him in person. Let alone talking, she wasn't even want to text him.
     "What!?"
     "I think you are sober now."
     "If you are not going to say something important I am hanging up." She was trying to sound cold as much as she can.
     "I wonder how you are doing. You haven't gone straight home last night. I want to ask so much where you were but I also know you wouldn't answer."
     "Good. At least you know your place sometimes."
     There was a short silence. Then she heard him exhaling deeply.
     "Why don't you want to understand how important you are to me? I wonder about you. I worry about you. The only thing that I want is for you to be alright." His voice was reflecting the feelings he said.
     She never denied his sincerity. This fact was forcing her to give up her decision. But she wouldn't be able to do that. She had no intention to give in. She made up her mind and protected her will. That's why she had to hurt him even if she doesn't want it.
     "If you want me to be alright then stop bothering me Barış. I've told you so many times that I don't want you, even the most stupid person would understand by now." She grimaced from the disturbance of her words and she closed her eyes. She had felt the same sadness herself. That was the same conversation as usual. That's why she never wanted to talk or seeing him.
     The same short silence attended the conversation again. But this time it was more effective.
     "Hayal... You are forgetting how much I know you. I know very well why you are saying these. And you know I'll never give up, whatever you say or do."
     There wasn't anything else to say. She just hung up. It wasn't coming to an end no matter what she did. He managed to annoy her again. She threw the phone on the table.
     "Damn it..." After all those times, just because of last night, the alcohol was managing to get into her head.

✘

     "You. The shameless one. Maybe you were the one who caused most of the pain. Your betrayal was the biggest one. Look at the point where you begin. You don't even have the things you had before. Now, you will lose the last thing you have. I know; you thought that you've gone through more than you caused and that it paid the price of your penance. And that it made you free now...
     A compassionate expression appeared on the killer's face. The victim thought that it could be her salvation. But when she heard the killer's laughter, her hopes crushed. He was playing with her.
     "Nothing you experience in this world will compensate what you did. Just like the heartless one, you have to die too."
     The killer saw his victim's expression on her face. The edge of his lip curled up. Because he knew what was her fear made of the most.
     "Yes. I've killed the person who you afforded to do anything for the sake of. But don't worry, he thought about you too before dying. By saying that I wish I wouldn't make that big mistake."
     When the victim learned that the man -who left her long ago but- she still loves was murdered, the fear of death left its place to surrender. She was crying from the moment she fell into the killer's hands. But now there was a different density of her tears.
     "I don't see any regret in your eyes. Looks like you think all those times you spent with him are worth destroying someone's life. While you were doing all those things, you continued to smile at the person you've betrayed. Your shamelessness makes me sick."
     The killer looked at the knife he took out of his pocket with the same satisfaction. Then again caressed it with the same sensitivity.
     Before a long time, the victim had lost her legs' control. While the murderer getting closer to her, she was trying to escape by crawling. Of course, she knew there was nowhere for her to run but the killer was studying her face without blinking and that was terrifying her. It was like he was trying to catch something in her face.
     "You are the shameless one. The one that shouldn't be showing her face. Do you understand what I am trying to say? You are the one that will lose her face. While this is materializing, the one that will feel it."
     The victim looked him with empty eyes. She was starting to understand. Now, she was going to have to accept the things that she will have to go through. And then the endless fear's turn was going to come. She was at the point that everything started and ended. At the point that the pain started and her life ended...
     The killer's search on the victim's face was continuing. When he finally saw the regret he was looking for, he started to give her the indescribable suffering. After that, there were only screams, tears and pleadings...

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     Heyy again,

     I hope you are still here. This translating job is soooo much harder than I thought. But I won't give up.

     In this chapter the killer took his victim's face 'cause she was shameless. In my language being shameless means being faceless. I mean the word's meaning is like that. She is so shameless that she doesn't care about showing her face; like she literally doesn't have a face. That's why the killer is taking her face. To make her really faceless. (?) (I don't even know if i am understandable right now. I hope I am.)

    See you in the next chapter...

    (I hope I will.)