Stars//ChanLix

Chapter 9

"HOW COULD YOU GET MARRIED AND NOT TELL US?!" Jisung screamed, which caused all of us to laugh at the panicked squirrel. we ordered some take out as we talked about relationships, or friendships, or maybe crushes, and a lot of other random stuff

there was a knock on our door and we almost didn't hear it over all the laughter, but i did. "hey did someone just knock on the door?" i asked and everyone looked at me confused "i could go check if you want Lix" Chan said about to get up "no its fine i can go check!" i said with a smile before getting up and walking to the door

i didn't even bother to look through the peep hole, i just opened the door and soon wished i hadn't

"son come with me!" he said in a harsh whisper, i just shook my head and said "no" continuously as i try and slam the door in his face but he caught it before it could shut. "I'm never going to go back with you!!" i almost yelled, which was enough to warn the ears right around the corner

i pushed on the door trying so hard to close it before he can force himself into my life and ruin it once again, but he was so much stronger then i was. 

he gave a hard push on the door right as i heard Chan behind me speak "who is it Lix?" his voice had a bitter tone to it as he caught a glimpse of my fathers face.

my father gave a hard push to the door, sending me flying into the wall not far behind the door. i slid down the wall as i heard my father step forward. i opened my eyes to look at Chan, then i heard a dreaded click. 

and before i knew it i heard a loud noise and my eyes grew wider then i ever thought they could. 

"CHAN!!!!!" i screamed as my voice cracked and i crawled on my hands and knees to get to my husband "Chan, no god no Chan! don't do this to me!" i said as i took his limp body into my arms, even thought the bullet went through his brain, he was gone but i wasn't going to accept that fact, it was to painful

"Chan.. Chan.. Chan" i repeat his name over and over as tears stream down my face and onto his as the head of my lifeless husband lays on my thighs

"Chan, you can't leave me! you said i was your everything! you said you never leave me C-Chan, please C-come back!" i place my forehead on his as tears stream down my face

"we cant have a forever if you leave me so s-soon" i say as my voice cracks. 

i was so focused on my dead husband that i didn't even realize the police that showed up. 

"I'm sorry sir but we have to take his body" said a paramedic. 

i didn't say a word as my tears kept falling, i stood carefully, treating Chan's body as if he was still alive.

i march to the man in cuffs 

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!! HOW COULD YOU!! HE LOVED ME!!" I screamed, and officer stopped me before i could reach the man "he would never love someone like you" he spat 

" WE GOT MARRIED YOU BASTARD!!" i yelled and i collapsed to my knee's, my head in my hands as the ache in my heart just wouldn't go away

"no this cant be happening!" my voice cracks again as i felt a hand on my shoulder "this is just a dream, just... a .... really, really bad dream.." i mumble, my voice getting smaller as i speak

"hey its going to be okay" Hyunjin spoke and i shook my head frantically "nothing is okay!!" i almost yell out of frustration and sadness soon i was embraced by all the boys, i felt all their love through our group hug but no matter how much love i receive it'll never be Chan's

the tears continue to fall as they continue to hug me, some of them crying as well, but i couldn't register anything except the fact I'll never get to see my husband again, the only man i ever needed, the love of my life, my soulmate! he was all of those things to me and now he'll be in a casket buried 6 feet under, to be forgotten. 

my life was torn down to nothing within seconds. seconds, minutes, and hours I'll never get back! i wish i spent more time with him, i wish i told him i loved him more often then i did, i wish he was able to get to live his dream

i wish for so many things but now they will never happen no matter how much i want them to.

why is the world so against me

"i wish for once i could find happiness and keep it" i said followed by sob after sob, they all stay silent knowing what i meant, we all knew Chan, but they didn't love him as much as i did

the love i had for him was real, i want him back, i want my husband back 

"WORLD JUST GIVE HIM BACK TO US!! please... I'm begging you!" was all i was able to get out before breaking out into more sobs then before

Hyunjin was rubbing my back as someone came up and gave us a card of some sort.

then i saw then carting Chan away, with a towel covering the bottom half of his body. 

i get up with shaky legs and rush to him, grabbing his hand in between both of mine as i bring it close to my face, he was paler then normal, he felt lifeless, you could tell just by looking at him that he was never coming back. 

"Chan i love you so much! please don't ever forget that, and God don't forget me!" i say before they load him into the ambulance and that's when i break again. falling to my knees, as tears fall down my face, reaching out to the leaving ambulance as if i could pull it back and say goodbye a million more times

it should've been me...