"Leave it, doctor," I said, masking my own red colors to be kind. He bowed his head and left the room.
News on the television chattering. Burning birds mistaken for burning stars. Everywhere...
But mine was missing. Maybe gone. If I dropped the stone, then I would remember to hurt. I tried not to listen. Family first.
Dean pulled up the other chair to sit next to me. Quietly mourning what hasn't happened yet.
Sam reminded me too much of older hurts. The father I never asked for, but loved to death.
Watched him go away in life and death. Lost twice.
They looked the same.
So tired of death. If only could stop him from coming. Forever. Mom. Friends. Castiel. Bobby. Meg. Now Sam.
And so many more I slew with my own hands. Even the monsters. Just wanted to be done with death.
"Ha-Hazey?" he breathed my name unto the abyss in which he stared.
"Hm?"
"I hate to ask...But...can you still the future if you want to?"
"Most of the boxes are locked," I answered,"secrets go in, but can't come out."
"I know.." he said, trying to understand me, "can you try?"
Biting lips. I didn't want to watch the movies again. Always too many colors. Too many doors.
"You want to see if he lives..."
"If...If I can. I need something. Please. I'm...trying really hard not to give up on him. Aren't you?"
"The sword is seeking hope, " I finally looked at him. Pleading for me to help. His last hope. The last light.
"Yes."
I took a deep breath. "I will try."
Standing, holding a hand on Sam's forhead, I fell into myself.
The place between all things swallowed me. Drowning in the colors. Focus.
Flexed my control. Pulled on the reins. Searching.
It hurts, like it used to. I can't hear the world. Just the endless voice of all things. "Show me the Serpant!" I begged into the vortex. It fluctuated. Flailing. Failing.
Blocked.
"No!"
I pushed harder. Walls were searing. Burning. My own screams in the distance. Determination stabbing a hole through the resistance. White light spilled out from between all the spectrums. A way through.
Blinded, if only for a moment, or maybe an eternity. All relative. Almost forgot why I was there. A test of willpower.
Then I saw him. Far from the here and now. Just sitting. Talking. Reading. Shaky vision. Barely possible. Certainty was fragile. My grip was fragile and it broke. Throwing me off. Slamming so hard back to what only the mundane could know, that I fell.
The chair came down with me. Mouth tasted of blood. I hit my chin and bit my lip very hard.
Dean's voice calling, reminding my ears to listen to the realness.
"You okay?"
My head thundered with a vicous pulse. Migraine of the ages. I almost forgot what it felt like. But the worst was my back. Stinging and searing like snakes of fire instead of lines of ink. Smoke rising.
"I'm sorry, Haze, that was a bad idea...I'm mean Jesus Christ, you almost caught fire."
I smirked through my split lip as he helped me up. "But I am the Seer."
"Yes you are," he agreed with shaky pride for me, "did it work?"
"Mostly. "
"What do you mean mostly?"
I lowered back to my chair, grunting at the snakes still cooling and steaming. "I saw him," I began, while massaging my throbbing eyeballs, "but it is fleeting. A shaky ripple in the sands. Almost lost."
He didn't care. He smiled in newfound lightness. "You crazy ass-" Dean abruptly grabbed my aching head and kissed hit hard, "you're the shit. You know that?"
Calling All Angels
Start from the beginning
