Why do I still love you?

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     Valentine's day hit. I'm with my girlfriend pretty much the whole day, she is being the sweetest, loving, and caring girl ever and yet when I come home all I think about is you.

    And not just the way you held me. Not just the way you pulled my hair or made me submit. Not just the way you gave all I pleasured and desired.

I miss you.

I miss waking up to you. I miss the way you made me laugh. I miss your laugh. I miss your really bad dancing. I miss the annoying sounds you made that got me angry. I miss you.

And I hate it.

I hate how I miss you. I hate that I can't completely give myself to my perfect girlfriend because I still love you. And she knows I still love you. Yet she stays with me. I love her but, I love you as well. Which sucks because I don't ever see you or talk to you. So can't I forget about you. Why can't I forget how you hold me, how you kissed me, how you made me laugh, how you wrapped your hands around my neck, how you went so rough that I thought you were actually mixing up my organs.

Why does love have to work this way?

Why do I still love you?

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