moments between moments

twenty nine - with you

You say it was fun.
You say I should have been there
You say I would have liked it
But I wasn't there
And now I'll
N
E
V
E
R
Have liked it

You know things I don't
You are closer because of it
You have jokes because of it.
And when I ask
You look away
And now I'll
N
E
V
E
R
Laugh with you

You say
'We should do it again sometime'
But whenever I try to join in
It feels flat
It feels like no one is having fun
It feels like
I'm a kid again

And no one came to my birthday party.

I feel like I'm crying in a bathroom at a party

like I got locked outside after curfew.

like someone took the last slice of the last pizza right in front of me as soon as I arrived.

Like as soon as I left the room you started laughing
As if I couldn't hear

I can almost see the thing I want
But it's just out of reach
Because I didn't make it in time.

____________

I don't know where that came from, I was feeling lonely. I miss home I guess.