Dont Be a Hero

Dirty Politics

Tears sprang into her eyes and her bottom lip quivered.

"Aww, c'mon! Don't do that," he pleaded with her. "I really hate it when you do that, Macy!"

"Chief!! He's being mean to me again!" she wailed, turning her watery blue eyes toward the Chief.

Chief Munson seemed distracted and he didn't appear to have been listening. He hung up the phone still muttering.

"Wolfe! Don't antagonize my kitten! I'll skin you alive," he said absently, lacking the usual bark in his voice. And then, "Hey... you know the politician guy who came through here to meet and greet with our officers? You two spoke to him. You shook his hand, remember?"

Jackson nodded. "Sure, Chief. Yeah. The guy you were all freaked out about impressing and then went on and on about for like two days.  I remember."

Macy just sat with her arms folded. She resembled a 4-year-old with an attitude. Her bottom lip jutted out and her brows were furrowed together. For once she didn't have anything to say.

Chief Munson fidgeted and looked uncomfortable at the way Jackson described his behavior regarding the politician. He seemed embarrassed.

"He shot himself last night," he finally blurted out. He was rubbing his temples, wearily. "He stuck his own gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger. Neighbor heard the shot and got suspicious. Called the cops. Turns out he wrote a farewell note to his wife, complete with a confession to all sorts of horrifying crimes."

Jackson and Macy (her woes apparently forgotten) both stared at him with their mouths open.

Suddenly Jackson guffawed. Laughter erupted from him like a geyser.

"Wasn't the whole community humpin' that dude's leg? Even you, Chief! You talked about that guy like he was your first crush in grade school!" He laughed even harder and tears started to well up in his eyes.

Macy grinned. Her eyes shot back and forth between Jackson and the Chief. Chief Munson sat there and glowered at Jackson, looking for all the world as though he was going to shoot him at any moment.

"Wolfe!" he barked, but Jackson barely heard him. He was sprawled back in his chair holding his stomach and laughing so hard he was afraid he would suffocate. Macy, no longer able to stop herself, began to giggle, too.

"It isn't funny, Wolfe. Keep laughing and..." The Chief glared at Jackson. His face started to contort and he looked surprised with himself when he burst out laughing right along with them. "I ought to fire your ass for this, Jackson Wolfe!" he laughed, holding his sides. Tears began to spill down his cheeks as well.

It took a few minutes for the three of them to sober up. Macy had her compact out and was dabbing at her mascara, trying to keep it from running down her cheeks.

"You boys! Look what you've done to my makeup!"

Jackson and Chief Munson looked at her straight-faced for a split-second before bursting out laughing all over again.

"Alright! Alright. Okay! Let's straighten up!" the Chief barked with authority. His eyes continued to sparkle though, and he followed it with, "Maybe I'm not such a great judge of character! What do you think?" 

"That would be an understatement, Chief!" Jackson replied, grinning. He wiped his eyes and did his best to sober up.

"Alright. So why'd you call us in here?" he asked once everyone was relatively calm again. "Isn't  this someone else's department?"

Chief Munson sat back with his head cocked to the side. He seemed to be pondering the question.

"I'm not sure, kiddo," he finally replied. "Something doesn't seem right to me. Something fishy about the whole thing. Doesn't seem like a guy who has the world under his spell... about to run for governor... why would he suddenly find a conscience? There's something more to this. Maybe something falling into your jurisdiction. Call it a hunch. Just check things out. Sniff around. See what you turn up. Homicide will work with you if you need any information."