You're Not My Friend [JJK]

CHAPTER 4: What f*ckery is this

"Aren't I underage? Isn't this illegal?"

"Let's say it's a training."

"But—"

"Just don't tell your mother."

INSIDE THE FIRM'S office there is a small pantry where Park Seoyeon found herself staring at her cup of coffee. The young lady watches how the liquid follows the movement of her spoon over and over. Little drops are starting to splat on the flat surface but she couldn't careless, she was diving too deep into her own world that she doesn't know what she's doing.

The hue of the black coffee reminded the young lady of the first and last handgun she had handled. She remembers how her hand perspired as her father lifted her arm, teaching her to aim at the empty mug that was sitting still on a wooden log. Her mind recalls how light it felt in her hand, making her tighten her grip on the spoon she's apparently holding as if it was the handgun.

Trains of memories have suddenly entered her mind.

"In the count of three, you'll shoot." Said her father, holding onto her arm and corrected her posture. They'd trapped their ears beneath the thickened headsets and caused his voice to become slightly unheard. "Focus, okay?"

Unable to think of words, Seoyeon simply nodded as she kept her fingers tightly wrapped around the gun in her hand. In the count of three it is, she reminded herself kindly. Her lips parted as a deep sigh escaped whilst her eyes couldn't see anything but the ceramic mug at the distance. Any tiny massive disturbance can make the bullet fly.

To tell that she's not afraid to do things like this is a huge lie. It's even a big achievement for her to be able to hold one. Yet there she was, narrowing her eyes for a better view as she gulped her cowardness, trapping all of it inside her stomach. The handgun in her hand strangely became cold, accompanied by the cold breeze in the middle of the forest where they stood straight, doing the so-called training.

"Come on, let me see the future cop in you." Her father's eyes twinkled in excitement as he clasped his hands together, having high hopes in her performance. The thought of his daughter becoming a police like him is a dream come true. "One . . ."

Even though her eyes are locked on the target, she could tell how bright her father's smile was. She can hear it from his voice.

"two . . ."

His voice was filled with thrill. On the other hand, such enthusiasm filled Seoyeon's chest with guilt. How can he see the future cop in her when she can't see it in herself from the very start?

"three!"

Her father had finished counting but only silence went after. His eyes that were once filled with excitement looked at her with confusion. Thereupon the young lady let out a sigh, a heavy one, as she slowly brought her arms down. She gently held her father's wrist and placed the handgun on his palm after. Seoyeon couldn't look straight in his eyes, but she had to and it's to show her sincerity.

"Father." Seoyeon gulped the lump in her throat and had a hard time figuring out whether she should continue her words or not. "I'm sorry. I failed you."

"What's wrong?"

"I . . . I don't want to be a police."

It would have been lighter in her chest if he scolded her. It would have been more acceptable if he ranted his disappointment. It would have been easier if he got mad at her.