squidbob oneshots

SANDY ARE YOU KIDDING ME

This is, in fact, my artwork.

   "Sandy! Sandy, I need to talk to you!" Spongebob said as he burst through the door of said squirrel's tree dome, quickly putting on the water-filled helmet.

   "Huh? Oh, Spongebob! Hey, come sit down. What's botherin' ya?" Sandy asked as Spongebob said down at a small picnic table with the former Texan.

   "I, uh..." he started, beginning to blush. "I-I kind of have a crush....o-on Squidwa-"

   "I KNEW IT!" Sandy exclaimed. "I CALLED IT! I CALLED IT! I-" she stopped when she saw the confused look on Spongebob's face. "Oh, uh...sorry, go on."

"I-it's just...I know he's kind of grumpy sometimes, but who can blame him?" Spongebob began to rant. "I'm always bothering him and trying to be nice to him and get him to like me but all I've done is make him hate me even more and now I've dug myself into an even deeper hole but I can't stop digging and I just-"

The next day.

Sandy awoke to a knock on her tree dome door. "Come in!" she called, hoping her guest would hear. He did.

"Oh- Squidward? What brings you here?" she said, focusing her attention on the octopus.

"I need to talk," he muttered, sitting down at the same spot as Spongebob did the other day.

"Alright...what's up?" Sandy inquired.

Squidward took a deep breath. "I think I have a crush on Spongebob," he admitted. Sandy forced back a grin.

"Care to elaborate?"

Squidward averted his gaze. "If you want me to. I really appreciate how he's always trying his hardest to make me feel happy, and when it doesn't work out—which it usually doesn't—he always tries his best to make it right. Sure, he can be annoying sometimes...maybe all the time...but I just can't help but want to be with him. He's just....so kind," he sighed.

"I see, I see..." As Squidward vented to her, Sandy had been thinking of a plan, and she was going to put it into action no matter what.

One week later...

This was the day. Sandy had scheduled another meeting with the two of them at the same time, with Spongebob arriving a few minutes beforehand. Before she knew it, Spongebob was at her door. She motioned for him to sit down across from him, where her guests usually sat. They had a casual conversation before Squidward arrived, unnoticed by Spongebob.

The octopus walked over to the two. "Hey Spongebob, you're in my sea- wait..." he cast a glance at Sandy, a look that said 'SANDY ARE YOU KIDDING ME HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME YOU'RE GOING TO PAY FOR THIS'. Little did he know, the sea sponge was also giving Sandy the same look.

Spongebob moved to one side of the bench, and Squidward moved to the other side. They both sat awkwardly until Sandy broke the silence.

"So, what brings you two here today?" she questioned.

"You- uh, you told me to?" Squidward said with absolutely zero confidence.

"S-same here," Spongebob added.

Sandy gave the two looks. "Do you know why I told you guys to come here?"

The two glanced at each other for a split second.

"No." They replied in unison.

Sandy let out a groan. "Really, are you guys seriously so daft you can't notice your obvious crushes on each other?!" she exclaimed.

Squidward inhaled. "Sandy, that isn't something to joke about," he hissed in an almost-whisper. Spongebob sat there, dumbfounded at what Sandy announced.

"Look, I'm telling the truth about both of you, since you've both been arriving here to vent about your crushes on each other for about a week. I'm gonna leave now incase you make out or something. Have fun, boys!" Sandy said as she exited the tree dome.

"..."

"..."

"So, uh..." Spongebob started. "She wasn't lying when she said that...?"

Squidward shook his head. "I'm guessing she wasn't lying about you, either?"

"Nope."

"...Hey, Spongebob?"

"Huh?"

"Can I....uh.....kiss you?" Squidward murmured.

"I thought you'd never ask."

Nobody:
Me: *ends all my oneshots with spongebob saying "I thought you'd never ask"*