jesus of suburbia. saint Jimmy x reader

Sitting on my crusifix

You sit in Jimmy's car trying to stop yourself from having an anxitey attack, you focus on the scenery outside and wait for him to say somthing or to begin driving. He takes a deep breath.
"Alright, first things first. Are you okay?"
"I really dont know."
"Okay. For seconds,"
"wait!"
"yeah?"
"Are you okay?"
"Physically, yes."
"Good."
"Now, am I taking you home orrr?"
"No. you can just drop me off at Joshes house I guess. I just have to call him."
"Okay."
You dial your best friend Joshes number and call him.
"Hi Joshy. can I stay the night tonight?"
"Hey! Yeah of course my parents are on a buisness trip as usual so you can."
"Thank you so much."
"Of course darling."
"Okay see you soon."
"Okay. Love you!"
"I love you too Joshy! Bye!" You hang up. "He said yes."
"Okay. Ill drop you there then."
"Thank you."
"No problem." It takes about half an hour to get to Joshes house. There's an awkward silence for about half the drive.
"Jimmy?" You break the silence.
"Yeah?"
"I'm breaking up with him."
"You are?"
"Yeah."
"Good." He looks over at you. "He doesnt deserve you."
"You know, you were right."
"About?"
"Your girlfriend really is a bitch."
"I still like her.."
"Thats fine. I'm just saying." You look at your knees. "Sorry."
"It's fine." He pulls into the driveway. "Were here."
"Bye Jimmy.."
"Bye." He reply's, anger lining his voice. You look up at him and he's just staring straight ahead.
"Jimmy.." You say in almost whisper and rest your hand on his knee, He quickly pulls his knee away causing you to flinch. You back away from him. "Sorry.." You squeak out, tears filling your eye's. "I'm gonna go now.." You open the door and jump out.
"Y/n.." You ignore him and turn your back away trying not to let him see you cry. "Y/n!" He calls again. you turn around and look at him not speaking. "I'm sorry.. I didnt mean to scare you.."
"It's whatever, you know.. I should be used to it by now." you spin around and walk to joshes door, you bang on it loudly and shout "I'm here Josh!"
He runs down the stairs and engolfs you in a giant hug.
"I missed you!" Josh yells.
"I missed you too dumbass." you sniffle. He doesnt ask whats wrong, he just scoops you off your feet and presses his forhead agaisnt yours, he then gives your forehead a quick peck. You look over his shoulder and see Jimmy's still sitting there and he's glaring at Josh. Josh swings the door closed with his foot.
"lets go watch a movie."
"That sounds amazing." He takes you upstairs and chucks you on his bed.
"I'll be back." he disappears downstairs for a while. You can't help but wonder why Jimmy was staring, he would'nt be jealous would he? No, he has Amanda... Why would he want someone like you? Josh interupts your thinking by chucking a bag of chips at you.
"Thanks Josh."
You fall asleep curled up beside Josh his arms tangled around you, this is normal behavior for him. He's always been one to show a ton of affection to you regardless of the fact you're both taken.

***********Time skip**************

You wake up to Josh shaking you.
"Y/n! wake up my parents are coming home in like 40 minutes! I'm not allowed to have girls over while they're gone."
"Fuck!" You leap out of his bed and rush to his bathroom, you quickly run a brush through your hair.
"Y/n, I can't drive you. it'll take me an hour there and back and I'll be in trouble."
"It's okay. I'll call Jimmy."
Jimmy agree's to picking you up. half an hour passes and you hear a honk outside.
"Bye babe." Josh pouts.
"Bye Joshy." you hug him and go out to Jimmy's car.
"Hey y/n"
"Hey.." He pulls out of the tiny driveway and drives towards town.
"Y/n I just want you to know I'm really sorry."
"I said it's fine." He pulls over and shuts the car off. He grabs your waist and pulls you onto his lap.
"look at me." You feel awkward so you dont listen. "Y/n. look at me." He puts his finger under your chin and lifts your head up so your looking at him. "I mean it you know. I really am sorry."
"O-okay.." He stares into your eyes for a couple seconds. "We should get back into town." You tell him. He shakes his head.
"Yeah no. you're right." you crawl back into your seat and dont talk for the rest of the ride. "Where am I dropping you?"
"Just under the bridge is fine."
"Okay I'm headed there too."
"cool."
you arrive and go sit with Dean.
"Hey." He greets.
"Hi." You sit infront of the fire and zone out.
"I'm fucking him." You overhear Amanda say.
"What was I to you?" Jimmy asks.
"A friend, someone I loved and a memory. A great fucking memory."
"I dont love you, you dont even get to be a memory."
"Nice fuckin tattoo then." she snarles. Jimmy gives her a sloppy kiss, It wasnt even really a kiss he basically just licked her cheek and started walking away. "FUCK YOU!" She yells and chucks a handful of dirt at him.
"Oh now you're gonna come after me?" He runs back towards her. "You're just a pair of tits. Thats all you've ever been to me." He speed walks away and kicks an empty pop can as he passes by Anthony.
"Jimmy." you run after him. "I'm sorry."
"She really is a bitch."
"I know." You hug him. "It's gonna be okay."
"Let's go."
"What."
"We're getting wasted."
"Okay." His buddy gets a bottle of Gin for him out of sympathy. He takes you to this weird chain-linked platform thing on the outskirts of town. After
drinking half a bottle Jimmy turns into an emotinal mess. "Jimmy are you okay?"
"No."
"Do you need a hug?"
"No.. I need you to listen."
"Okay."
"Fuck. Y/n I like you."
"W-what? Why me?"
"I dont know."
"Okay."
"I'm sorry." He starts crying.
"Hey." you cup the sides of his face. "It's okay."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I think I like you too." You smile. He leans in and it looks like he's gonna kiss you but instead he burries his head in your shoulder.
"I'm sorry." He repeats.
"Shh. It's okay."