No Regrets

Soon I felt my body become heavier. I couldn't even hold up my hand anymore. I couldn't feel my myself breathing anymore. The tips of my fingers felt like I had dipped them in frost. I couldn't tell if I was shaking anymore. I barely could hear Aristia yelling for me. It sounded distant and distorted. 

I could feel the vision of her before me slipping. Her eyes widened. I believe she knew just as well as I did what this meant. I was dying. Soon enough, I would just be a lifeless corpse upon imperial ground. 

I felt her hands grasp my face. I watched as her mouth moved. I couldn't help but to close my eyes. The last thing I saw was her golden eyes closed as she yelled to the sky. 

"He lost a lot of blood. He'll be groggy for a couple of days, but I believe he will make a great recovery. You all are fortunate."

What? Where the hell am I?

"Thank you! Thank you so much." That was my mother's voice. I've never heard it laced with so much grieve and worry. Usually mother kept herself very composed. I felt a ghost-like touch upon my face. "Oh Sein. I'm so happy you're alive."

I'm alive...

"He's a tough boy, Ernia." I could hear my father as well. 

I tried to will every ounce of strength I had to open my eyes, but my body was still to weak. I couldn't even move a centimeter. The sound of my mother crying suddenly filled the room. 

"What a reckless child. For that girl no less." She wailed. 

"He's a hero. When he's able, he will be granted an award for his sacrifice."

"So that's supposed to appease me for almost losing my son? An award! Hah! He nearly lost his life and all that gains him is cheap piece of metal to wear. If my brother had any sense he would grant him the hand of that girl . Lord know my nephew wouldn't have had such courage." Her voice was cold and malicious. 

"You don't know that for sure, My Love. You never know what will happen in that kind of situation. Lady Aristia accounted the attack as a fierce one. We were lucky that Sein was the only one injured and that there were no casualties on our end." My father tried to soothe. I felt uncomfortable not being able to chime into the conversation.  

Father was right. I had spent my entire life dedicated to the sword, but in the moment, nothing can prepare you. Maybe his Highness would have reacted the same, maybe not. Hopefully, they would never be placed in that situation. From experience, it isn't fun. 

Hearing Aristia's name made my body jolt. I wanted to see her. I wanted to clarify once more that she was okay. If she was hurt, I'd never forgive myself. 

"Duke Rass." The sound of our elderly butler entering the room silenced the conversation. "Lady Aristia has come to pay her respects and to see the young master."

She was here! It was like Vita was answering my prayers. 

"Send her in." My father spoke. 

"Duke and Duchess. I am sorry for the untimely visit." I heard her say. It was near a whisper but I could hear it as clear as day. I couldn't help but notice her voice sounded raspy as well. 

"Nonsense! He will be pleased to know you came." He greeted joyfully.

"Has he woken up?"

Yes!

"Not yet. The doctor said he would be out of it for a few or so days. It'll only be a matter of time before he's up and about again." He replied. "Why don't we give you some time with him. Maybe he'll wake up for you." Before she answered, I heard the door clasp shut. The small clacking sound of her heels was all I could hear before I felt her hands lift one of mine. 

"Oh Carsein." She whimpered. "I'm so sorry. It's because of me that you lay here. If I had just been more observant... " I wanted to stop her, but my body still felt so tired. "I don't know if you can hear me, but a lot has happened in the three days you've been asleep."

Three days! She has been worrying over me for three days? I've been laying here for three days? I haven't eaten in three whole days!

"The enemy was taken in and interrogated. They had been hired by a rival faction. I was the main target. The emperor requested that I step down from being a knight. It wasn't an order so I appealed it. It was then a meeting was held about my safety and my future of being the Empress. Because I was still adamant about staying a knight, His highness called off my engagement to the Crown Prince."

What? Was she serious? That meant... It means... I...

"Carsein, I hope you wake up soon. There are a lot of things I wish to discuss with you. For so long you have been such a great friend to me. It was because of you that in my lowest days that I laughed. It was you that put a smile on my face even when I was upset. It was you that protected me from my own stubbornness. I miss you very much. I find it hard to smile without you around."

It was then that felt her soft lips upon my cheek. Everything seemed to stop. As fast as it happened was as fast as it vanished. I could hear her heels clacking once more. She had to be leaving.

No! I have to tell her how I feel! I can't wait anymore! I'm trying so hard to move even just a little or to at least speak. I need to tell her. I need to tell her how much I...

"...Lngh...Loh..ve." Her heels stopped immediately. I willed every inch of my body to listen to my command. Slowly and very painfully I began to move my hands and arms. My eyes cracked open just a bit. I struggled trying to lift myself to sit up . Soon her heels were moving quickly back to my side.

"Carsein!" The door flew open as soon as my name left her lips. Opening my eyes more, I could tell both my parents, my brother, and the Marquess were standing there, but I didn't spare them more than a glance. I had a bigger purpose. Soon I felt Aristia's arms wrap around me. The pressure was painful, but welcomed. She cried into my chest. 

I breathed in, mustering all the strength and courage from my body, heart, and soul. 

"Aristia." She looked up at me with teary eyes and I almost lost my composure. "Can I call you Tia now?" The question wasn't one that I intended. I wanted to smack myself for my nerves getting to me, but her laughter brought me back. 

"Yes." She stated gleefully. then she looked almost bashful. "Do you mind if I call you Sein?" 

"You better." I smiled. I ignored all the aches in my body. I had to get this out. I felt my face become serious as I breathed in once again. "Tia...I ... What I want...Would you do me the honor..." No matter how I tried to form the words, they wouldn't come out. 

"I believe my foolish son is trying to ask to court you?" My mother finally spoke. All eyes fell onto her as she turned around to leave. "Honestly, Sein. You practically gave up your life and now your're too scared to tell her how you feel. I raised you better." 

My face felt hot hearing those words. She was right, though. I faced the dagger with no hesitation, but I couldn't even tell her how I felt. 

"I accept." Those words were spoken with a soft voice. 

"What?" I couldn't stop myself from blurting out. 

"I said I accept." Aristia pursed her lips. "Or perhaps you didn't mean it and in that case I don't accept. "

"What!" 

"Wow, Sein. You're messing up big time." Kaysian chuckled. 

"But... I didn't... I mean..." It was then Aristia broke into fits of giggles. She then looked at me with a playful look. 

"I've been waiting for about two days now for your proper request and now you're going to  make me wait longer. Not very noble of you Sir Carsein." I couldn't help myself but smile.

"Hey Tia. I really love you, you know." I smiled at her and was very pleased to see her face flush crimson. "Will you be mine?" 

"Yes." She giggled. "Yes I will."