More Than a Memory

Chapter Four: The Run In

I take a deep breath. "Actually, I do. Thank you so much."

"Of course. I'll see you in a sec." She hangs up.

I watch the door to see her come out with a full cart of groceries, and I step out to help her load it all into the car.

"Hey, I got you some of your favorite Nutella snacks. I figured you'd want some." She smiles.

"Oh my gosh, you're awesome! That's actually what I was looking for when I - you know." I say, not wanting to talk about it.

"I figured." She laughs.

We finish loading up the back seat and get in. Just as I look up, I see him coming out of the store, and immediately, we make eye contact. I look away instantly. "He just came out of the store, and I'm pretty sure he saw me."

Dani looks in the direction of the store. "Red shirt? Blonde hair?" She asks.

"Yes... why?"

"Because he's walking this way right now." She rushes out.

I gasp. "Well what are you waiting for? Go!" I yell.

She continues to look straight ahead and sighs. "Look Tessa, I get that you're upset and everything. He's a complete asshole for what he did, don't get me wrong. As much as it scares you, you're gonna have to face him eventually. You'll never find peace if you don't."

I sigh. "I know. But I don't even know what I'd say. I'm not ready." I say. "Please just go."

"Tessa-"

"Dani, please. I wanna go home."

"Tessa, you-"

"Dani please-"

"Tessa! I'm right here, and he's almost to the window. I know you. You will never do this if I don't make you do it. I'm right here, ok?"

I don't speak. I just nod my head as she rolls my window down.

"Tessa, hey." I look over, as I hear a voice I haven't heard for over four years. I'm suddenly overcome with anger, and the nervousness leaves me as quickly as it came.

"Hey? That's all you have to say to me!? Hey!? Oh hey Elias. It's not like it's been four years or anything. It's not like you promised to call as soon as you got settled in. You refused to say goodbye, remember? You promised to call. You promised! You fucking promised!" Angry tears are streaming down my face at this point. "You couldn't even show up to a lousy dinner. And to think I was actually hoping you'd show up. I was actually excited to see you again. But not anymore. I hate you. I really do."

"I'm so sorry Kitten. I-"

"No!" I cut him off. "You don't get to call me that. You lost that right the day you stopped being my best friend. I don't even know you anymore, and I don't wish to. Just leave me the hell alone. I'm done." I growl. "I've been done."

I glance over to my best friend. "Let's go, Dani."

"Tessa-" Elias starts.

"I think you should go." Dani cuts him off. "This is too much for her right now. Just go, please."

"Alright," he sighs. "But I'm not going away, Tess. I'm not." I hear his footsteps as he retreats.

"You ok?" Dani asks.

I don't look at her. I roll my window up and and wipe under my eyes. "Let's just go home." I mumble.

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We get back to the house and unpack the bags without saying a word. We finish, and Dani clears her throat. "So, do you wanna play cards, or watch a movie or something?" She asks.

"No thanks. I think I'm gonna go lay down for a bit." I mumble.

"Tessa-"

"Look Dani, I don't wanna y'all about. I just want to be alone right now, ok?" I say before making my way to my bedroom.

Instead of laying down, I decide to get into the shower. I turn the water on and wait for it to heat up. I stare at my reflection. The happy go lucky girl I was a week ago is now long gone and in her place is an empty shell of who she used to be.

I undress and get into the shower, letting the hot water roll down my back. I sit at the bottom of the tub with my knees to my chest and finally let go.
Four years worth of pent up emotions pour out of me all at once.

I sit there for what feels like hours and notice my fingers are pruning up. I stand up and finish washing up, before stepping out of the shower and getting dressed. I walk across the hall and into my bedroom before plopping onto my bed and putting my headphones in.

I lay there for a while, and I start to feel myself drift off to the sound of "Let Me Go" by 3 Doors Down playing in my ears.

"You love me but you don't know who I am, so let me go. Just let me go..."