My Best Mistake [#1][#WATTYS2016][COMPLETE]

five*

I had never meant to have that effect on people. And I had never meant to damage the happiness of those around me, which is why I kept to myself, and why I never bothered to question my parents when they blamed for every little thing which went wrong in this family; I simply took everything they threw at me and never once argued with them.

And now I had done the same thing to Braydon. I had hurt him, angered him, and I had ruined what we had shared for a little over a year now. It was my fault, as it always was, and I had accepted that from the moment I knew that I was going to have to tell my boyfriend what I had done.

"When?" Braydon finally spoke.

"A couple of months ago. I threw a party to piss my parents off, but I had too much to drink and it just happened," I knew that it wasn't a proper explanation and that it was never going to make up for what I had done, but it was the truth and that was all I could offer him right now.

"Who?"

"That's no important, Bray. It was a mistake and he had made it clear that he wants nothing to do with the child. In fact, he wants me to get an abortion and get on with my life, but there's not a chance in hell of that happening."

"I need to know, Clo. Just tell me who it was," I didn't miss the angry edge to his tone, nor the way in which his hands clenched into fists at his sides, and it was side which I had only ever seen a couple of times. He had never laid a hand on me, even when I thought that he was going to, he would walk out and come back a couple of hours later with bloodied knuckles, and he would never tell me how it happened when I asked him.

"Why is it so important to know who I fucked?" I was the one in the wrong, I was the one who had cheated and not the other way round, so I don't know why I was getting sharp with him. Because, had he just told me that he had gotten some girl pregnant, I would probably be acting the very same way that he is and I would need to know who it was that he had slept with.

"I just need to know and I need to be able to understand. So, just tell me, who the fuck was it?"

Alcohol. Alcohol is the reason people do anything most of the time, and it always makes people do seriously stupid things which they only end up regretting for the rest of their lives once they have remembered what happened as a result of said alcohol.

"Matthew. Matthew Jenkinson," I swallowed as I said his name, the sensation of needing to throw up everywhere was overwhelming, and that was just from the mere mention of his name.

"Seriously? You had sex with the jerk?" It sounded so much worse when someone else said it aloud, and it sounded even worse when it rolled off the tongue of the person you were supposed to love, though the knowledge of who had slept with apparently did nothing to quell the growing anger within Braydon because he had a murderous glint in his eye and looked as though he was just about ready to punch someone. "Of all the fucking people in the world, why did you have to sleep with him? I don't understand."

"I am sor—"

"You're sorry. I know. But sorry doesn't change the fact it happened and it sure as hell doesn't change that you're pregnant with his kid," Braydon finally snapped and I was actually terrified about what was going to happen, it was as though he was a completely different person and, if I said one more thing to piss him off, then he would lose his temper with me in a way he had never done before.

"Braydon—"

"Sorry. It's a funny word when you think about it. You can it and you can actually mean it, you can be genuinely sorry for what you did, or you can say it and then do the exact same thing again," I knew that this was the end and that I was probably never going to see Braydon again. Not that I blamed him, I had broken his heart and cheated on him with the one person he hated more than anything, and then I had tried to beg for his forgiveness without actually telling him what I had done.

I would have been more surprised if he hadn't have run a mile, if he hadn't have lost his temper with me and shouted at me, so at least I knew that he felt something for me as well and I knew that he now hated me. In this moment, Braydon Sanders hated me, and I was one pissed off teen, which was never going to end well.

"So? This is it? This is where we end?"

"I would never be able to trust you again and there's no way that I can bring up a baby which contains half of his DNA," disgust laced his tone and, even though Matthew didn't give a shit about his child, I still gave a damn and I hated the way that Braydon spoke of the child as though it was the worst thing to have happened—I may not have been ready, I may never be ready, but I was going to give it my best shot and I was going to hurt anyone who dared to get in my way or anyone who dared to speak a negative word about my child.

"I would have been more surprised had you stayed with me," I managed to say, hiding the pain which was ripping me apart from the inside, because Braydon didn't need to know how weak I was in this moment.

"Goodbye," I listened as Braydon walked out of the room and slammed the door behind him, emphasising his anger and showing that he really wasn't going to be coming back any time soon; he was gone for good and I would never be able to win him back.

My parents were disgusted with me. Jason was lost for words and didn't know what he was supposed to say. Abigail had made everything a thousand times worse. Matthew just wanted me to murder the child. And Braydon hated me.

This is why I had no one. This is why I was alone. I was the screw-up and I fucked everything up, and that's how it was always going to be.