I'm not dead. But I do suck at life. I'm so sorry it's been so long, but I'm already halfway done with the next part, so it's not going to happen again. Please let me know what you think. Thank you so much for reading. Cheers to my first update of 2020!
tw: self-harm, anxiety
summary: now that tony knows, peter struggles to stop cutting.
word count: 2367
May and Tony got him settled at home, and Tony finally headed out, though it was clear he was reluctant to do so. May for her part had finally gotten the storm at least temporarily calmed at work and focused on pampering her nephew. Ned came over after school with the work that Peter had missed and a new Lego set for them to build, and they passed the remainder of the day doing homework, building the set, and watching Looney Toon episodes that Ben had recorded on VHS tapes years ago.
Ned asked about the bandage on his arm, but Peter's reply that he'd scraped it when he fell after getting hit was completely believable and satisfactory to his friend. Of course, whenever May left the room, Ned milked him for every detail about the true story he could get, since otherwise they could only talk cryptically, through Tony's cover-up tale.
A news team had showed up at the apartment before Mr. Stark had left, but one order from him that they leave Peter and May alone had seen them packing up and getting out of there, and no other teams had tried. If they did, May was prepared to get Tony on the phone with them as soon as humanly possible.
By the time Ned finally went home, Peter was exhausted and in pain, and he quickly retreated to his bedroom. Despite the pain, he could tell that his accelerated healing was kicking in, and he was grateful he was out of the hospital so they couldn't notice and get suspicious. He was slightly concerned about that for his one-week follow-up appointment, but since it was unlikely he'd get the same doctors as before, and there would be seven days between the two examinations, he was hoping they'd brush it off as a fast... but not inhuman... heal and call him lucky and their treatment effective.
May got him settled in his room, made sure he didn't need anything else, and reluctantly went to bed at Peter's urging. She was exhausted, and she was going to have to go back to work the next day. He had decided to go to school as well, just so that she didn't feel obligated to stay with him again. Yeah, it was probably going to be hell, but it was his responsibility to be an adult and tough it out so that May could focus on what really mattered. That certainly wasn't Peter.
He heard her brushing her teeth and getting ready for bed before the apartment was plunged into silence. And the thoughts and fears that he had shoved to the back of his mind all day finally tumbled to the forefront, like an overstuffed closet given the smallest permission to open. He tried to fight it, but he couldn't... not anymore... and he finally had to face what he'd run from all day.
Mr. Stark knew. It had been destroying his mind ever since he woke up, and now he was terrified. The billionaire had been so good that day... honestly treating Peter more like a son than an intern... but Peter was sure that all boiled down to pity. There was no way he'd want to continue working with him. He was just too disgusting. Tony didn't deserve to have to be around such a revolting person.
But what if he told May?
He couldn't.
But what if he did?
Peter squeezed his eyes shut, desperately fighting the panic that was rising in his chest. May couldn't know. And Peter really didn't want to be forced to beg his mentor not to tell her. Especially because, if he'd already decided he needed to, there would be no talking him out of it.
