Dior
It's been 2 months since me and Dom have broken up. I decided to temporarily move out the house and go home to my family until I have my baby.
I needed to get away from the place that I thought was home .. too many memories are in that house & I didn't want anymore negativity.
I currently live with my mom & dad, in the house I grew up in. It feels so good to be surrounded by love & family. It's been awhile since I've been here in Savannah but I'm happy to be back.
"Dior, which one do you like?" My mama said as she showed me some maternity dresses. Since I'm home I decided to have the baby shower here where all my family can easily come with out issues with traveling . "None of them," I replied.
I rubbed my stomach as I felt the kicks. "Oo, that one hurt baby boy.." I groaned. And yes, it's little boy.🤞🏾💙💙 I'm beyond excited to meet my son.. I hope he looks like me because if he's been baking all this time to look like his daddy I'm gonna be pissed.
I laid back in the recliner as I watched baby showers & gender reveals on YouTube. I sighed as I saw the couples happily welcoming their babies. I love Dominique so much, i mean how could I not? He's the father of my child & it hurts that I've cut all tithes with him right now..I blocked him on everything because I don't even wanna look at him.
My family already made it clear that he's not welcomed, and I'm not okay with it fully.. but as of right now I don't want to see his face..
My mom plopped down next to me distracting me from my thoughts. " you miss him?" She asked. I scrunched up my face & then I felt a tear drop.
"I just want my family...," I began. "Look at you and daddy, y'all raised all of us together ... even though I know y'all been through shit but he didn't humiliate you and make you look like a fool.. and it's that I still love him.." she held me & rubbed my back.
"I know baby..you're hurt. But cheer up for your son. Your baby shower is 3 days away. We're about to honor you and our sweet boy. As of right now, up until your due date...that's all that matters. We love, he loves you.." she said she rubbed my belly. "And we're always here baby girl."
"I love you ma," I said as I squeezed her tight. "C'mon let's get you dressed for this photo shoot," she said as she helped me up. (Photo in mm)
Dominique (Lil Baby)
I've been locked in the studio everyday these past too weeks. Me and DiDi our basically done, she trashed my studio, threw my shit out, and I havent heard or seen her sense. I got so much anger built up because I fucked up big time...
I finished my 5th blunt as I was writing some lyrics down. My album Harder Than Ever is dropping in a couple months and I'm working on a couple more songs.
Lately I've been deep in my feelings and I wrote a whole song for Dior... shorty is my best friend fasho, we met at a rough patch in my life during all my family bullshit and when I had to bury some brothers...she was there. Through all of that.
I've always had commitment issues but when I met Dior, I wanted to give it a try. But I fucked up time and time again...
I lit my blunt and filled my cup up as I read over my lyrics. Then my producer played the beat while I wrote some more..
I know you remember how I would hold you
Still remember how I approached you
I think I loved you 'fore I knew you
Know we be fuckin' 'fore I screwed you
Made a promise I won't use you
Play my cards right, I won't lose you
Just wipe your eyes and stop this cryin'
I told the truth, that I'd been lyin'
I gave you racks, I tried to buy in
I even did the unthinkable, I'm sorry for what I did to you
Take me back, if I was you and I did what I did
I probably would, I probably wouldn't
I scribbled in my notepad as the beat played. I felt myself getting upset so I rolled another blunt.
"So how's this with wifey?" Ky asked. Ky was my cousin on my pops side who I discovered as a dope ass produced before knowing we were blood. We've been tight ever sense..
"I haven't seen her in 2 months. I have no idea if shorty still in the city." I replied as I broke down some more weed.
"Did you even try to pull up on her at least?" He asked. I shook my head. "Nah, ion got time for her brothers to try and kill me and shit..so I just left alone."
"Effort is key, even though you may have fucked up other ways ... effort is the way to go my guy.. show her youre sorry, if you are." Those last three words replayed in my head and all I saw was red.
"Yo what's your problem man?!" Ky shouted. When I snapped into reality I punched bruh dead in the chest.
"My fault," I said as I helped him up.
"Don't get mad at me for your fu-"
"I think it would be best if you leave nigga, I ain't mean to knock you but just go ahead bout your business I'll take it from here.." I said as I took a sip of my beer.
Fuck, I think I'm losing it ...
