Hi! Can I order a 12 piece Chick-fil-A nuggets with ranch, a large waffle potato fries, and a large cookies & cream milkshake?
𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬- 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐤-𝐟𝐢𝐥-𝐀
[peter parker x reader]*
[al...
Peter In my defense, they were bad guys and being rude™
RIGHT SO ITS TOTALLY LOGICAL FOR YOU TO BREAK INTO MY CAR WHILE IM DRIVING SO THEY CAN ALSO SHOOT AT ME YOUR [sᴛᴇᴠᴇʀᴏɢᴇʀs ᴄᴇɴsᴏʀ]ING GIRLFRIEND
Peter I was all out of web fluid What else was I supposed to do?!
Idk run
Peter I can't outrun weird alien laser blast gun things!!
NEWS FLASH!! YOU'RE A SUPERHERO SUCK IT UP BUTTERCUP
Bucky She's got you there
Tony My life is flashing before my eyes
Bruce Good for you, Toe Knee
Tony
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So there I was driving as fast as my 2013 Ford Escape could go with a low tire down the crowded streets of NYC because I was feeling like getting boujee Chick-fil-A My masked vigilante boyfriend screaming like a whiny toddler in my passenger seat with glass everywhere Being shot at by weird alien laser gun things And that's when my life got flipped-turned upside down and I'd like to take a minute just sit right there I'll tell you how I WAS ALMOST BLASTED TO DEATH
Sam Did you just use lyrics from The French Prince of Bel-Air
Yeah and what about it salmonella
Bucky
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Sam Bitch
Peter We've all almost been blasted to death, you ain't special
MY CAR GOT TOTALED, PETER AND MY INSURANCE DOESNT COVER BEING SHOT AT BY DERANGED SUPERVILLAINS, pEtEr!!
Tony I'll pay for it
tHANK YOU, TONY
Tony She said my name😪
Take it in. It'll never happen again
Peter It's your fault! YOU WERENT GOING FAST ENOUGH
I cAnT oUtRuN wEiRd AlIeN lAsEr BlAsT gUn ThInGs Well guess what, PETER! I CANT OUTDRIVE WEIRD ALIEN LASER BLAST GUN THINGS
Clint Shots fired
So can someone come pick me up? Peter left me in a ditch to fight the weirdos is neon purple spandex THOR COME PICK ME UP
Tony He's in Asgard though
Thor Ok!
Oh pretty rainbow :D
Tony Bitch wouldn't come to NY for a meeting but comes to NY to pick up a kid stuck in a ditch I will remember this, Point Break
