When Yugyeom smiled it was like the whole room lit up and your mood was immediately perked up. But today, nothing anyone did or said made you feel anything better than sad. This morning you woke up and scrolled through Twitter until you stopped to read a long thread about why you weren't worthy of dating Yugyeom. It went on about how he was so successful and talented but he wasted his time on someone like you - a person just wanting his money and, directly quoted, a 'clout chaser'.
Deep down you knew none of this was true. You hadn't known he was a k-idol when you met him, only three months in of dating each other had you come across an ahgase's Twitter account and spotted him doing a live performance with 6 other members. It was then you understood why he barely had time for you but when you did meet, he'd make you fall more and more in love with him.
Your eyes dragged to where Yugyeom stood, in the middle of the practice room, as he playfully nudged his fellow maknae BamBam. Watching him made you tear up. The ahgase was right. How could you possibly deserve someone as special and amazing as Kim Yugyeom when you were nothing but an average person with an average job?
It seemed unfair at how the universe put two opposite people together when millions of matter would get in between.
The love you felt for him was indescribable and nothing made you happier than being with him. But were you the same for him? You were sure that someone who was prettier, more successful and also a kpop idol would make him happier though. You felt guilty for separating him from his fans like this just because you were dating.
Dance rehearsal ended at this time and you sat quietly at the back of the car with your earphones in, listening to sad music by Def. Soul and RM. You pretended to ignore all the boys as they chattered all the way home, sometimes calling for your attention but you wouldn't respond. The volume was loud enough to ignore some of their conversation but every now and then you'd eavesdrop to see if they'd mention your name or have something to say about Yugyeom and yours relationship, but all they commented on was how quiet and upset you seemed. Every now and then Yugyeom would squeezed your hand during the drive but you didn't dare look at him with your slightly teary eyes so you just stared out the window with your hair shielding your face from anyone's view.
When you got home, you immediately beelined to the bed and pretended to be asleep when Yugyeom wanted to ask you about dinner. You just felt the need to be alone and cry over the honest truth about reality. You weren't meant to be with him. People like him weren't supposed to be with people like you.
You brought the Tweet back up and read it over and over again. Each time your eyes cognated the typed out words, the more you felt your throat close and the more moisture formed in your tear ducts. You choked on the lump in your throat and you cried. The IPhone slipped out your hand but your vision was too blurry to read the screen anymore anyways. Like a mantra the words repeated in your head and you felt like suffocating your brain to make it stop. You just wanted it to stop.
"Y/n?" You heard Yugyeom call from the door and you froze. You tried to lower the sounds of your breathing but the running of your nose forced you to sniff loudly and by then you knew it was too late. You couldn't hide the fact that you were upset anymore, but you didnt want to talk to him about it. Ashamed by the way you felt you hid your face from him when he walked around the bed to sit in front of you on the bed's edge. His hand coaxed your arm and you saw a glimpse of his hand reaching down for your phone.
You tried to grab it but he was already standing up and reading the hate message. "It's nothing Yugyeom. I'm fine. Just leave it alone." You snapped angrily, trying to get him to stop reading what was on your phone.
As his eyes trailed on the last line you gave up. There was no point in hiding it anymore. He knew.
"Y/n..." he dragged out as his gaze moved to yours and turned the phone's screen off. "Is this why you were in such a bad mood today? Because of what this person is saying on the internet?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowing in concern but instead of answering him you turned away. You couldn't look at him and tell him you were crying over something so silly.
"I- I don't deserve to-to be with some-someone like you." You stuttered, wiping your eyes and crossing your arms over your knees that you brought up to your chest. You rocked back and forth to somehow soothe yourself but instead it made the anxious and sick feeling in your stomach worsen.
The loving boy pulled you to him and cradled you in his lap. He kissed the top of your head as his other hand stroked your back. "I don't think that's true. I also don't believe I deserve to be with anyone else but you, Y/n. You make me happier more than anything else in this world. You know I'd stop dancing for you. I'd do anything for you. Just because someone doesn't love you like I do doesn't make what they're saying is true. I'm glad they don't either because only I'm allowed to love you like that anyways." His words wrapped around your ears like a warm blanket and the waterworks started back up again. He held out a tissue for you and you gratefully took it to blow your nose.
After a few minutes of Yugyeom just holding you and rocking both of you back and forth, he started to hum. The soothing sound and vibration of his chest made you relax to the point where you fell asleep.
When he was done humming your favourite song he looked down at you to see you fast asleep and he smiled to himself. It pained him to see you so upset and he wanted to protect you from all those horrible things that people are saying about you. His job was to protect you but he couldn't protect you from your own thoughts and that frustrated him.
He laid you down on the bed and tucked you in. The admiration and adoration he had for you wanted to explode out of him when his watched you sleep so peacefully. He couldn't imagine how someone so perfect could ever doubt themselves, especially being in a relationship with someone as flawed as him but that's what made him love you even more in the end. The fact that even though you've seen the worst in him you still chose to wake up every morning inside him and that's how he knew you loved him. He just hoped you knew how much he loved you.
Quietly he unlocked his phone and went onto Twitter. He retweeted the negative post with a long comment of his own.
In the middle of the night you woke up and checked the time but instead focused on the thousands of notifications you had. You opened the bird app seeing as it had the most activity going on at the moment. Ahgase's were mentioning and defending you left, right and center in response to that harmful Tweet. One of the first replies to that comment was from Yugyeom himself and you sighed. So much for not getting him involved.
"I'mdisappointed that you'd say these horrible things about someone you don't even know. I know IGOT7s are better than this. If you think this will tear Y/n and I apart, you are so wrong. I love her so much. Stop disrespecting my love like this. If anything I don't deserve her. She's my little sunshine :)"
