What's Special To Me|| A JC Caylen FanFiction

Chapter 9~Bye Bye Jc

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Jc's POV
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I sat on my bed. I had hit her. Again. Well, the first time was sort of an accident. But this time...

I was trying to hit Connor.

I swear, I thought he was the one grabbing my shoulder. He spoke right as Kris did... and I was so angry I wasn't looking where I was aiming. I just swung and...

God, I'm such an idiot, I thought to myself. I grabbed my pillow and threw it against my wall in frustration.

"Jc sweetie? Is everything okay up there?" I heard my mom call.

"Yeah," I tried to sound normal but it came out as more of a sob.

I heard my mom walk up the stairs and knock at my door. When I didn't go to open it, she did it herself. She gasped when she saw my lying on my bed with tears streaming down my face.

"What's wrong?" She asked and sat on my bed. I shook my head. "Jc, tell me what's going on."

I sat up slowly and looked at her. "You kn-know Kris?" At the sound of her name I felt sadness pang at my heart.

"Yes, why? Did she break up with you?"

"She m-might as well h-have." I felt like a little kid, crying in front of my mommy. "I accidentally hit her."

"Oh," she said and took a deep breath. "What exactly happened?"

"I overheard her saying to Connor that she loved him... but it turned out to be something she was going to say to me. I didn't know this, so I turned to leave. Kris grabbed my shoulder right as Connor spoke... and I hit her. I thought she was Connor... I messed up so badly."

She breathed in again. "Yeah... you did. But you can't sit here moping about it. I would go apologize to her, and explain."

"What if she doesn't take me back?" I asked.

"I know Kris. I don't think she would ignore you. But if she says she does, then leave her alone. She needs some time to herself as well."

I nodded. My mom kissed my forehead and walked out the door, closing the door behind her. I wanted to go talk to Kris, but at the same time I wanted to lie in my bed all day and do absolutely nothing. For the first time in my life... I felt depressed.

No one had made such an impact on my like Kris did. Yeah, I had dated girls before. A LOT of girls actually. But they either cheated on me, or I dumped them, or they just sort of disappeared off with another guy. But Kris was different. She was sweet, and hot, and when she looks at you with those eyes it makes you feel so important...

And now she hates me.

I wanted to cry all over again. Just thinking about her made me angry and frustrated and sad all at the same time. Finally I got off my sorry butt and walked downstairs. When I was grabbing my jacket, my eyes caught a pencil sharpener lying on the counter.

Doesn't Kris just unscrew the...

"Stop," I said to myself.

But a little voice in my head said, What if?

I opened a drawer and, my hand shaking, I pulled out a screwdriver. I heard a bump downstairs and froze. What if Mom came in on me? I grabbed the screwdriver and the pencil sharpener and hurried up stairs.

It took a few tries, but I managed to unscrew the razor from the plastic holding it.

This was it.

I bit my lip and placed the razor on my wrist.