Yes, I am crazy

Chapter 29 - Piece of pie

The voice snorted. 'Never thought I'd ever hear that sentence being said.'

I chuckled. "Well, I never thought it'd take so long for me to say it."

So I started to collect the corpses and drag them into a slowly growing pile. Unfortunately -totally unexpected, who would've thought?!- they were heavy. 

"Goddammit. Are they carrying bricks in their pockets or what?" I said as I pulled and pulled a man's arm with all my strenght, still only managing to drag him a couple of inches.  

'You are really weak, you know that?' The voice said and I dropped the arm and hit the air. 

"It's not like you're doing anything to help, you useless little pizza!" 

'Well, you want some help? Here you go!' The voice/all-knowing-sprit/maybe-zombie sounded very aggressive, but suddenly I felt adrenaline fill me, sharpening my senses excessively. 

I felt light, as if I could jump a hundred meters, buld a nuclear weapon, fight an alien-race, and pat a cat. Really, I don't think you understand how hard it is for me to get a cat still enough for me to pat them. Sometimes, I feel like they don't like me that much.

'Try now' The voice told me and I bent down and picked up the man's arm to try again. 

"This is so eay!" I exclaied as I felt like the previously almost immovable man was light as a feather. Although a very heavy feather. "It must be those gummy-bears I ate!"

The maybe-zombie sighed. 'It's me manipulating your brain and body making it fill with adrenaline. And some other stuffs of course. Just be quick,' she tried explaining.

"Naw. I still think it's those gummy bears. This is a piece of pie!"

'You mean cake.'

"I mean I'm hungry."

Soon the bodies were stacked in a pile high enough to reach the hatchet, and I started climbing. 

Though much stronger than before, it was still hard to get up on a pile when you kept slipping and whatnot. Still, I, as always, manage to climb with grace and I never fell once-

"Ough-" smack.

Okay, so I fell once. But still, I climbed with grace, okay? 

The adrenaline started to leave my body, making it a little harder to reach the trapdoor.

"Just a little more." I grimaced and reached as far as I could with my arm. Finally, my hand touched the hatch and I sighed out in relief.

Then, the sigh turned into a swearword as the hatch refused to budge.

"Are you kidding me?!" I punched the door in rage. I sat down on top of the bodies and put my head in my hands, supporting it as my shoulders slumped in defeat. I ignored the smell of death.

"That's it! I'm going to die." I said. "No one will ever known how great I am, how great I could've become! They probably would've renamed Alexander the Great to Alexander Samantha because I changed the meaning of great. I'm too young! There is still so much I wanted to do! Rob a bank, kidnap someone else for a change, pick a fight with a biker gang-"

'Seriously?' The voice asked, unbelieving. 'That's stupid.'

"You're stupid," I countered bitterly.

'Oh wow. World-class comeback right there. You should enter in rap-battles.'

"I wanted to do that too! Now I'll never be able to. It's all your fault!"