Supercell logic 101

635 3 13

by lordhelix475

by lordhelix475

1 Ok lets see who gets legendaries
   Candidate 1: 2000 trophies, can only increase trophies by being carried.
Of Course! Give him one.
   Candidate 2: 3000 trophies, spent hundreds on game.
Ah yes. This is a 'dedicated player'. To reward him, give him all 3!
   Candidate 3: 12000, genuinely excellent at the game. Ftp.
OH HELL NAW, GET THIS UNSLIGHTLY CANDIDATE OUT OF HERE. NO LEGIES UNTIL 15000- NAH SCRAP THAT. WERE NOT GIVING HIM MORTIS EITHER
Candidate 1 and 2 walks off happily while candidate 3 sobs in a corner.

(This genuinely happened to my friend. Hes at 12k without one. Im at 13k with only one, while my friend who doesnt play anymore has 3 at 5k ;-;

2 Lag looks at red team (your opponent) I sleep
Looks at your team: REAL SHIT. LEZDODIZ (lags you so much you cant even move, even though you are 2 steps away from the router)
Me: sobs in corner.
(This happens everyday, even when im using data)

3 Me walking into the matchmaking lobby
Yo supercell. I need some randoms to play gem grab. Can I have some? Im using my 700 mortis.
Supercell: ok fine.
Motions to one person: this is your level 8 teamate, bull. He is at 700 trophies, 4000 total. He expertises in bushcamping, and nothing else.
Me: B-but this is gem grab...
Supercell: Yes yes I know that. Dont interupt.
Motions to another person: This is your other teamate, piper. Shes level 5 at 500 trophies and 6000 total trophies-
Me: B-but this is a 700 trophy game...
Supercell: What did I say about interrupting? Where were we. Ah yes, this piper only auto aims, both attack and super.
Me:... Who are those guys? (Points to buff shadows)
Supercell: Ah yes. They are just your 750 opponents, at 15000 total trophies, all level 10 with the best star powers, and experts at both this game and their respective brawlers. Good luck! You'll need it!
Me: lordhelix475.exe has crashed. (Proceeds to hang myself)

Sorry if I sound salty, cuz I am. I just lost 6 straight games.

If you guys want me to do something in particular, tell me. If not goodbye. I need some emotional support right now. Salty af.