Redemption For A Monster (Marauder fanfic) Book Three

39- Falling Apart

Sara's heart dropped, as she suddenly realised how much danger she was now in.
"Are they going to kill me?" She questioned nervously.
"No. When the Ministry officials turned up last night, they insisted you be brought here, so that they could question you when you woke up... Since most of them saw Voldemort last night, they can't deny his existance any more. It was in the Daily Prophet this morning. And since they now know the truth, they believe everything that Dumbledore has been saying all year. Including the stuff about you and Sirius being innocent" answered Remus, pointing to the paper on Sara's bedside table.
"Sirius... He's really gone, hasn't he?" Sara asked quietly.
Remus lowered his head, and nodded.
A single tear fell down Sara's cheek, as she remembered what had happened the night before.

"Harry, is he O.K?" Sara questioned.
"Yeah, he's fine. Dumbledore protected him from Voldemort, and then again from the Ministry, by sending him back to Hogwarts last night. He also wants to come and visit you here, once the Ministry officals, who are waiting outside, have gone" admitted Remus.
"Thank Merlin he wasn't hurt" sighed Sara.
"His friends weren't too badly injured either, and Tonks will recover from her wounds soon enough as well"
"That's good... Why don't you send in the Ministry prats, so that they can say what they have to say, and then leave. Then I can see Harry"
"Are you sure you are ready to speak to them, so soon?"
"No, not really, but I want to get this over and done with as quickly as possible. So let's get this over with"
"Alright, I'll send them in, and then send Dumbledore an owl, so he can tell Harry that you're awake"
"O.K".

The Ministry's interrogations were long and repetative, but eventually they decided that Sara was not a threat, and had indeed been innoccent all along.
But Sara had to remain chained to her bed, until all the official paper work was completed, back at the Ministry.
Sara was alone in St Mungo's, despite not being injured, for the rest of the day, until Harry arrived later that evening.
"Are you alright?" Asked Harry, the second he stepped inside the room.
"I'm fine. I was not injured in the fight. I was just knocked unconscious by Kingsley, to stop me from hurting anyone" revealed Sara.
Harry approached her bed, and frowned when he saw the chain around her wrist.
"They're treating you like a prisoner" he growled.
"Apparently it's just a formaility at this point. But the Ministry have said I will be freed, and have my wand returned, once all the necessary paperwork is complete" replied Sara.

"Right... Once you're out of here, will you be going back to Grimmauld Place?" Harry asked curiously.
"No, it won't be safe for me or any of the Order to go back there. The house will most likely fall to Sirius' next closest relative, which is his oldest cousin, Bellatrix. Unless he managed to alter this, before dying, which I wouldn't put passed him" sighed Sara.
"No, it can't go to her!" Snapped Harry.
"I'm afraid that's the way things work Harry, and there's nothing we can do to change it... Not that I would want to go back there without Sirius"
"Then where will you go? To Lupin's?"
"No. I definately won't go and live with Remus, as that would take us right back to where we were after your parents died, which was not a good place"
"Don't you have your own house somewhere?"
"Not really. Me and Remus lived together in a cottage, for a few years, but I could never go back there again... I guess I could go to my friend Mary's for a while. She let me stay there before, so she might do the same again, now that I'm not a wanted criminal".

"Do you think it's my fault, what happened to Sirius?" Harry asked quietly.
"No. Harry, listen to me, Sirius' death was not your fault" insisted Sara.
"But it was. I went to the Ministry, and you followed. I led him to his death"
"You didn't know that was going to happen. You thought you were going there to save us, remember. Everyone wanted me and Sirius to stay behind in Grimmauld Place, but we both refused. We chose to go after you. Nothing was going to stop Sirius and I, from coming to your aid...
Besides, if Dumbledore had let us tell you that Voldemort might have tried to lure you there, then none of this would have happened...
We wanted to tell you the truth Harry, especially last summer, but Dumbledore made us swear not to. During the first war, Dumbledore was all we had. He created the Order of the Phoenix, and we all relied on him, he was our light in the darkness. Which is why we all find it so hard to go against his wishes.
So I guess it is all our fault, for not warning you about Voldemort".

"It wasn't your fault Sara. You were just following Dumbledore's instructions" Harry said quietly.
"Maybe. But I keep replaying his death in my mind, and I wish that I had joined him in his fight against Bellatrix, then prehaps he wouldn't have died" admitted Sara sadly.
"I don't think it's good for either of us to think about what could have happened"
"No, I guess not... How are you coping with all this? I didn't ask"
"I'm fi... I don't know how I'm feeling"
"That's O.K. It is O.K to feel like this... James and Lily might kill me for saying this, but Sirius and me saw you as our surrogate son. And I hope you know how much Sirius loved you... Although I'm sure you love your parents, you don't remember them. Sirius is the first person you have lost, that you have memories of. So is perfectly understandable to feel sad, Harry".

Tears began to slide down Harry's face, and Sara threw her arms around him, as best she could, with one hand tide to the bed.
"It's alright. It's alright to cry... I'm here" she said softly, as she too began to cry.
The pair of them stood there for ages in each others arms, holding each other as they both cried for Sirius.
He had been a father figure for Harry, and a best friend and lover for Sara. And neither of them knew how they were going to cope, without him in their lives.