Kim Yohan | To MY World [Discontinued]

5

"Oh Eunsang ah" my eyes becomes one line when I see him, he's my dongsaeng who I have taken care for a few years. I miss him so much and wanna know everything he has been gone through these years.

Eunsang runs towards us and gives me a hug.

"Noona I miss you so much" I can feel Eunsang pout in my neck and I giggle

"Aigoo wuri Eunsang has grown up so much" I pull away and pat his head. We haven't met for a few years and now I only realize he does grow up so much, when he was still young he only taller than me for a few centimetres but now my height only reaches to his shoulders.

"Just now I saw Noona's performance, it's so good!"

"Oh, you came to the audition?"

"Yeah I performed before your group and I passed the audition but you didn't see me" Eunsang frown

"Ah I'm sorry I was just too nervous hehe"

"Erm Em" Yohan clears his throat and then I realize he's still beside me.

"Oh Yohan lemme introduce, this is my dongsaeng Eunsang. Eunsang, this is Yohan" I talk while they smile to each other.

"Annyeonghasaeyo Eunsang"

"Annyeonghasaeyo Yohan"

"Yah how dare you call his name. Call him hyung aish" I slap his head and he shouts in reflection.

"Ouch! Noona it hurts!" Eunsang pouts and rubs his head.

"Aigoo...tsk tsk" I shook my head and help him to rub his head and Eunsang smiles.

"I know you still care about me Noona" Eunsang giggles.

Before I talk more, I still remember Yohan is standing beside, so I open my mouth, "Em, Yohan I think you can go back first? I think Eunsang and I will chat for a long time. I can walk back to dome later"

Yohan nods and says us goodbye before leaving.

.

"Eunsang, tell me what have you gone through these years. You have grown up so much!" Eunsang and I sit at the bench near the dance hall where Yohan waited for me just now.

"Em...just...being hardworking to study...go out to dance at 4am, joining the underground rapper at night, do part time job in the weekend...em I think that's it" Eunsang thinks for a while and talks, making me listen to him silently.

"Eunsang ah" I call him and he looks at me, "You've worked hard. Mahni himdeulji? (It's very hard right?)"

Eunsang smiles, "Aniyo, everytime when I feel hard, I will remember noona, and what you said to me, and that really gave me energy to go through all the hard times. And now my dream comes true, that I'm able to meet you again noona"

I look at him with bitter smile. This kid has always been suffering. His background is not that good but yet he doesn't give up on his dream and works so hard to overcome all the problems. I just adore him so much. Not as a guy but as a dongsaeng.

I open my arms to him and he smiles. I hug him back as he hugs me

"Sugohaeseo, eunsang ah (you've worked hard)" I pat his back as he digs his head into my neck.

"I miss you so much Noona, you have no idea how hard I study just to be the foundation student and get into this university to meet you" Eunsang hugs me even tighter in his arms, seems like afraid of he will lose me.

I skip a beat as I start to remember back things that he told me a few years ago.

I stay silent and Eunsang pulls back to meet my eyes, he hesitates to open his mouth, that's when I feel he will be talking about what I'm thinking now.

"Noona....do you remember what I said to you before you graduated?"

I look down as I stay silent again. Eunsang sighs,

"Noona" I look up to look into his eyes

"It's not like I force you to give me an answer right now"

"I just want you to know, I study so hard so I could come here to meet you. "

"I just want you to know, I'm serious. No matter is past time or present time, I always do"

"I'm not the little boy anymore. I'm a man now. Before this you were the one who protected me. Now it's my turn to protect you. I'll always be by your side prevent you from getting hurt. Even though you may not have feelings on me right now but,"

"I just wanna love you, with my own way."

I blink for a few times and look to the back of Eunsang. His eyes are so sincere and pure, his stern face tells me he's being serious.

Perhaps a few years ago, he was also serious. Just I thought that he was not mature enough to think about love.

But now he turns to become a real man.

But no matter when it is, my answer is always the same. Even it will be painful to him, I still have to voice out what I really feel for him. I love him.

Not as a guy but as a dongsaeng.

"Noona," Before I open my mouth he continues. I stop my words to listen to him.

"Did you remember when I was a kid and I asked you about love?" Eunsang smiles and looks at me. He always used to smile like that, no matter sad or happy, he always does.

I nod, he giggles.

"I asked you, 'Noona, why we must fall but not rise in love?' " my fingers keep holding the edge of my shirt. I press my lips into a thin line not to talk for a single word.

"And you replied me, 'because we will be vulnerable through it.' " Eunsang looks away

"Noona, you know what, I fall in love with you for so long time and I couldn't climb up from the pit. The pit is so deep that I fall for you even deeper. I needn't an answer from you. I just wanna be your angel. Whenever you're having hardships, whenever you're down, I'm always here for you." Eunsang looks into my eyes. And I still don't know how to response.

Suddenly Eunsang pulls me into a hug, making my eyes widen.

"Just let me stay by your side. Can I?" Eunsang whispers into my ear. He sounds so vulnerable like if I say no his heart will be cracking into many pieces. I think it will hurt him too much if I still reject him.

He will find who he really loves in the future. If he stays by my side I still can help him when he has problems.

I nod.

"Gomawoyo Noona" Eunsang smiles widely when he feels I'm nodding. He pulls aways and kisses on my cheek.

"Yah!" I shout at him and he pouts. I start to be guilty, "don't do that again, arraso?"

Eunsang nods so many times and I smile.

Even he grows up he's still a baby.

.

It's almost midnight but fortunately I get to ride the last bus of the day.

"Gamsahabnida ahjussi" I bow before I get down from the bus.

I walk along the road back to my dome. The dome is not far from the bus station so I can actually see the light of cafeteria on in front of my eyes. But only a few domes are light on, perhaps most of them sleep already.

I think back what Eunsang told me just now.

"I just want you to know, I'm serious.

Eunsang's words keep wandering in my mind. I shook my head, hope to get rid off of it.

He really acts serious this time. I have to handle the situation carefully so I can minimize his pain and let him get over his love for me. But what should I do...

I reach the cafeteria and turn right to go upstairs to my dome. Before I could go,

"Y/N"