Midnight Moonlight

vi. the way i loved you

He is sensible and so incredible and all my single friends are jealous...

"Oh my god!" My friends scream. It was the very first sleepover of the summer, and Thea, Andrea, Mae, and I are in our onesies. I had on my panda-printed one. Thea had a plain pink onesie, Andrea a green floral one, and Mae was wearing her One Direction onesie, which we all envied.

"He really did that?" Mae gasps. I nod, with a stupid grin on my face.

"I wish I had a guy like that..." Thea muses. I think back to last night's conversation with Sam and agreed. I had told him about my sudden urge to see the sea, and this morning, he blindfolded me and drove for three hours just to bring me to the beach. It was incredibly sweet.

He opens up my door and I get into his car and he says, "You look beautiful tonight..."

And I feel perfectly fine...

But then I blank out. Sam's bright green eyes and blonde hair were replaced by someone else's dark hair and dark eyes. Drew.

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, and it's 2 AM and I'm cursing your name...

Drew was never anything like Sam, I think. Then I reprimand myself for comparing the two. But there was no mistaking the dull ache in my chest.

You're so in love that you act insane, and that's the way I loved you...

Drew and I, we were never a perfect couple. It was all insults and arguments and falling into each other's arms in the end. Drew and I, we argued so much that nobody believed we were together.

Except us.

And as I lay down on my sleeping bag, one of the many littering the room, I stare up at the ceiling. I hear faint, slow breathing from my friends. But I couldn't sleep. I replay scenes with Sam.

He respects my space and never makes me wait and he calls exactly when he says he will...

"Are you okay?" He asked when I was crying.

"No, go away, Sam!" I lashed out. He nodded and when I looked at him, the devastated look on his face made me cry even harder.

"I'll call you at 10." Sam said softly and left. He left. Walked away, shut the door, and didn't say another word. I knew he was just giving me space, and I was thankful for that. But...is that what I wanted? Space?

You know what? When the clock struck 9:59, my phone started ringing.

He's close to my mother, talks business with my father, he's charming and endearing and I'm comfortable...

"Mom!" I covered my face with my hands. She and Sam were pointing to the classic baby pictures.

"Aww, look at you..." Sam commented. "You're so cute, Ava!" My face turned as pink as the footie pajamas I was wearing in the photo.

"Look at her!"

"Pretty," Sam shot me a look, all smiles.

Drew called me beautiful.

Breaking down and coming undone, it's a roller coaster kinda rush, and I never knew I could feel that much...

And that's the way I loved you...

Slamming the door, I headed up to my room. Drew followed me up the stairs.

"Ava, come on, open the door, please!" He knocked frantically. "Talk to me!"

"No!" I screamed back. At the time, I was thankful my parents were on a date.

"Ava, I'm sorry! Please!"

"Leave me alone, Drew!" I was sobbing. The knocking stopped. I could hear footsteps on the stairs. My heart dropped to my stomach. I didn't think he actually would leave. I crumpled to the floor.

Then, I heard footsteps running up the stairs. Moments later, my doorknob was jiggling as if a key was thrust into it. Then, it opened.

I never thought I could feel so much emotion when I saw him. Anger. Sorrow. Bitterness. Relief. Joy. Love.

We stared at each other, my embarrassing crying the only thing filling the air. I let him come to me and stroke my hair. I cried against his chest, almost forgetting that he was the one who put me into this state.

"God, Ava." He hugged me so tight I couldn't breathe.

"I-I thought you actually left," I sniffled.

"Oh, please," He scoffed. "You're Ava, and I'm Drew. As if we could be separated."

He can't see the smile I'm faking, and my heart's not breaking, cause I'm not feeling anything at all...

Sam and I. We were on a date. He opened the car door for me.

"Thanks!" I got in.

"Anything for you, love," he replied. I smiled...but it didn't feel natural. Don't get me wrong. I liked Sam. He never contradicted me nor made me feel fire burning against my stomach the way Drew...never mind.

I just didn't feel like the way I'm supposed to feel, if that makes sense.

You were wild and crazy, just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated...

Got away by some mistake and now...

"Can you please drive slower?" I held on to the seat. Drew was driving like a maniac.

"Don't worry, Aves," he shot me a quick wink. But I had reason to worry. Sure, the road was deserted, but this was Drew we're talking about.

"Aves," he called my attention as he slowed down. I faced him, and the driving bastard kissed me. While driving.

But I would be lying if I said I pushed him away.

I never knew I could feel that much...

And that's the way I loved you...

I get out of my sleeping bag, almost in a trance and walk out the door, still in my onesie. I start my engine. I drive.

Almost reaching my destination, I call a certain guy.

"Ava?" The voice replies, thick with sleep.

"Hey," I say, my voice shuddering. I take a deep breath, and say two words that would break his heart, but would set us both free.

"I'm sorry."

I reach my destination. I get out of the car, hang up my phone, dread filling my body. He didn't deserve that. But he also didn't deserve me; someone who doesn't love him the same way. He'll find someone better. I'm sure of it.

If there's one thing I learned, it's that love is not always sweet. It's the fire you feel inside when you're with the one. Sometimes love is arguments and insults and fighting. Because after all that, you'll end up in each other's arms. And you'd think that there is where you'll want to be.

So yes. He'll will find someone better. I'm sure of it. But me? I probably won't find anyone better than him. The boy I'm driving for at midnight. In my panda onesie, I ring the doorbell to his house.

He opens the door and his blue eyes go wide. Before he could mutter "Ava", I grab a fistful of his shirt, pulling him towards me and kissing him full force.

"You-" Drew starts.

"You." I smile.

I never knew I could feel that much...

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Song used is The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift. :) However, the song doesn't seem to have the ending this story has...but I made sure that it wasn't following the song's message that she let him go. I made Ava be an exception to the song, just because I like how the song itself is a conflict between two guys, and ultimately, she chooses Drew.