I'm Not Perfect (Jimin Ff)

:1: Imperfection

Everyone thought her life was blessed.

Having such a well being parents, graduated excellent in well known university, great personalities, a pleasantly beautiful.

And now married to the young millionaire businessman and she being a dedicated housewife.

Looks perfect isn't it.

But no. For you, it might be looked perfect but you were far away for being happy.

Why?

Because all this while, you just lived in people's expectation. All your decisions were made by your parents. Not you. You just followed without once unsatisfied about it.

You thought that was okay. Following whatever decision made by your father will make you happy. For a while you did think so.

But not after you married. Yes, your husband was nice. He gave all that you wanted. He provided you luxury. He provided you safety. He provided you everything he had.

And you being a grateful person you were, you repaid him by being a wonderful wife to him.

You did cooking mostly and that was after you begged him countless times to allow you to do it since he didn't allow you to do anything else. What were maids for if he hired them for doing nothing? Not that you don't like the maids but you were not a fool too. You alone couldn't do every house chores in such a big mansion. Of course more than one manpower were needed to be used to keep the house tidy and clean.

Your married life was okay going through its first anniversary. Even though your marriage was arranged but you didn't mind since you knew your husband. Not that you were in a relationship but he was one of your campus mates. Not a close one either but at least you knew him and his family.

Of course after led a married life for a year, questions about an heir will arise. You did wanted children. You dreamt about it also. It's just you didn't have the luck to have it yet.

His parents couldn't wait to have a grandchild. Your parents too. Somehow the pressure was pushing you too much that you became stress. You did everything you could so that both of you could have a child. You even did took the test and thank God both of you were normal. It's just the matter of luck which it didn't come yet despite you thought you both worked so hard on it. Your husband actually didn't matter about it. He was always showered you with sweet words and love to keep you strong and be positive.

But that was not long. Coming to your second anniversary, something did change. You as a usual you tending to be his wife faithfully. You still did the same thing and it's kind of surprised that you're not feel bored yet. Might be you loved the way you lived now.

But it was different for your husband. He seemed changed. Not that he was not loving anymore. He still was. But he seemed distant. He seemed busier than usual. He kept coming back home late and got out early. The time you saw him only when he had something he left at home. Weekends also. You rarely met him. You did asked about his latest behavior but he just smiled and told you that he had a lot of works he got to do.

You couldn't question him since he still treated you well but you felt emotionally and physically lonely. You needed him by your side. His parents still pressured you about their heir. And you always could dodged it if he was next to you - comforting you. However, since he became busier, you lost your calm and became stressed. The less quality time of sex life did not help either. How could you do it when the time he's back, you already asleep. He went out before the sun rise. He almost gone every weekends, so how could an a heir be provided when there were less works of making it?

Things became more and more complicated and you could say -  disappointed when your marriage life coming to its third year.

Your husband did not care about you anymore. He only came back just to change his clothes and sleep. Dinners that you made for him always tossed in the bin. You had your breakfast alone. You even went shopping with just your driver. You did everything alone.

He didn't even brought you to events and functions anymore. You did remembers that he always made you to accompany him to any events that he was associated with. You missed to see your friends which were your husband friends' wives especially Sowoon. Not that your husband prohibited you to become socialise but you really had not many friends since you were really a picky person. You just had a selected few of friends in your circle. Sometimes Sowoon came to your house just to chat and spent the time together but since she became a mother of two little boys, her times with you was restricted. So, you always went to her house. Lately, you didn't go to hers. Seeing her playing and attending her children made you heart twitched. You couldn't help felt a little bit jealous. Her life was seemed so complete by having Seojoon as her kind husband and two cute cheeky little boys.

Meanwhile, you...

You felt worthless.