Female Stalker - A Brooklyn Love Story

Chapter 3

I couldn't sleep that night, constantly checking my phone hoping I would get a text from him. And thinking that maybe I should text him myself. But if I did, what would he think of me? I was afraid he would despise me for how I treated him.

Maybe I should have let sex in the backseat happen.

As soon as a closed my eyes, I saw us together that day. I saw how we were sitting at Masal, how I was feeding him Kunefe, and how he smiled eating from my fork. How he was hugging and kissing me by the water.

And his words... "When a guy kisses your hands, it means you are not just another girl in his life, it means you are very special and very dear to him. You hear me, Lola?"

"...It means you are very special and very dear to him..."

"...very dear to him..."

He said, "You hear me, Lola?"

I guess I didn't really hear him.

And what I answered? A cold, "I just don't wanna see you, ok? It's that simple!"

How cruel was that...

I was swirling in bed with these thoughts, unable to sleep.

Maybe I would be happier if I looked just average. If I wasn't spoiled with men's attention. I would be able to notice good men, to appreciate them. And I would be sure they were after me for my character more than for my looks.

I finally calmed myself down with an idea that I would just text him tomorrow night. I would tell him that I wasn't really serious when I said that I didn't want to see him. I would tell him that I got a little mad and offended by something that he said about my looks.

I woke up at 11, took a shower, put on my bathrobe, made myself a coffee and sat at a kitchen table. I like sitting in the kitchen, looking through the window, sipping coffee and just thinking.

All the people walking down there on the street, they all have their own stories. They have relationships, marriages, divorces, love affairs, failures and successes. Each one has its own unique story. Why do we meet certain people in our lives? Is it by random or is it destiny? Does the universe try to teach us something with each new person it sends into our lives?

I looked at my phone. No messages.

Should I call him? Should I text him?

I should wait till the evening. But if I wait I will keep thinking and worrying about it the whole day.

Ok, I will open notes app and write down a sample text.

"Good morning. Listen... Sorry for yesterday, I was just kidding."

I was kidding about what?

"...when I said I don't wanna see you again."

Ahhh, can't send that. What if he replied, "Crazy bitch, leave me alone," or "You were kidding and I am not. I don't want to see you for real. Goodbye!"

Shit!

I needed to get out of the house and have some fresh air. I went to the bedroom and put some random cloth on. After grabbing my wallet, keys and the phone I opened the front door and almost hit someone on the other side. What I saw when I opened the door made me think, Fuck...I'm not even wearing my makeup.

He was standing right in front of me.

I looked at my door, then at him and finally asked, "What are you doing here?"

"Lola, you almost broke my nose."

"What is your nose doing behind my door?"

"Hey, I was about to knock on your door when you suddenly pushed it. What happened, is there a fire in your apartment?"