bc i'm upset

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Hey I'm here because I'm upset

I wanna watch StarKid productions but my internet doesn't work so I literally can't do anything on the internet right now.

I also need to go watch Endgame again bc end credit scenes ya know?
AND Spider-Man Far From Home is coming out soon and I need to see that too

I also need to binge watch Bones because my family has been watching it without me EVEN THOUGH I AM THE ONE WHO WANTED TO WATCH IT AND I AM THE ONE WHO STARTED RECORDING IT I'm not mad at all

I also am just so god damn tired of summer and being in my house around my brothers all the time. Especially when my older brother is constantly watching Bones and spoilers are the bane of my existence so I spend all of my time in my room to avoid spoilers and yet I StiLL know way more than I want to so that's fun.

I'm extremely aggravated and I have been for at least 10 days now probably more and things just keep piling up making me more aggravated and somehow I have nothing to do but also way to many things to do. I don't understand and everything is frustrating me and I have a job but I'm paying for two trips so I have no money but I'm also so bored that I have nothing to do but every time I leave the house I spend money and I just hate summer so much I want cry BUT I HAVENT CRIED IN SO LONG I don't remember how it feels which makes me want to cry even more.

You guys I am fucking depressed.... like I am genuinely going through a really bad depression right now and I'm constantly on the edge of having an anxiety attack and/or a mental and emotional breakdown as I don't know what to do with myself.

I thought I was doing better because I actually took a shower and did my laundry but after those things happened I spiraled so fast I didn't even realize what was happening. And I just hug out with some of my favorite people and I missed them so much and I'm so glad I got to see them but now I'm back at home with wi-fi that doesn't work and a family that does everything without me 🙃

I AM FEELING ALMOST EVERY NEGATIVE FEELING YOU CAN FEEL RIGHT NOW

I genuinely need professional help, fast

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