What is it?
Is it one's desire to achieve something...?
Do I have it?
I feel my blood boiling, it is pumping.
As I watch those around me achieve success.
No, it's not anger or jealousy, its stress.
Its pressure and frustration
I have not been blessed.
Everything I do, makes everyone around me seem so unimpressed.
So, how do I dress to address this?
I sit in my room, under my blanket crying every night.
Praying to god to either show me what's right,
Or show me the famed white light.
But I get nothing!
Left alone again tonight.
Shall I take my life...
Go to the kitchen and grab a knife
And see how everyone will act...
in spite.
What will happen to my ambitions?
Will they pass onto someone else?
Maybe less complex,
With less stress.
Or unlike when I was alive, become a great big success.
As I float in the dark, I am surrounded by all of my failure.
Reminded that I am nothing.
I hear the voices of those who wished death upon me.
I have indulged in such a taboo behavior,
There is nothing to savior.
The hate and despair, the cussing
It all plays back, as I sit their motionless, what else is there for me.
I could have become a lawyer, a singer, a dancer, a designer, an actor, or a makeup artist.
Have a husband whom is quite modest,
Children that are the most amazing and smartest,
But what about now.
Do I just throw in the towel and bow down?
Do I work towards my goals?
Even though I'm losing control.
Do I continue to let my heart turn cold?
Do I keep suffering now, for ambition?
