The Beginning of the End

Epilogue

It was a surreal experience hearing the principal call out my name. "Justin-Trent Van Galen" was my signal to walk across the stage. Some guy in a high position of power stood there waiting for me, shaking my hand and eventually handing me my diploma.

With that, I had graduated. What happened after was a blur. It was nice to see people congratulating me despite what had occurred around two months before. It was nice seeing my family—immediate and extended—come together to celebrate me, even though it stung to know that my dad couldn't come. It was nice seeing Dinah and Heather be so full of joy, but I'm pretty sure we were all glad to get as far away from our school as possible. 

It was especially nice finally seeing Claire for the last time. I had to walk past her to receive my diploma, and I could feel the glare that she gave me, her privileged ass sitting in the first row. I couldn't help but give her a glance to show that I could care less and that I was feeling and doing great. It was funny seeing her with so much makeup on just to cover up all of the bruises and cuts brought on by the hits that my friends landed on her. Well-deserved, for sure. But nothing was more comforting than knowing that Claire would be going across the country to attend some elite university in the fall. I would finally be able to put her and that chapter of my life behind me, and I was hoping like hell that I would never have to see her again.

"Bye, Claire," I mouthed to her while I went to reach for my diploma.

But before I could even head towards the direction of my family after the end of the ceremony, I couldn't help but wonder how I had even gotten here in the first place. Within weeks, I had raised most of my grades up to a B- and higher. Maybe I barely had any best friends in my life to distract me—they were either MIA, beat the fuck up, or dead. Tragic, I know, but with all the time on my hands, I had enough time to myself to get my shit together, do my homework and study to do well on final projects, and here I was. Not having to worry about failing and repeating my senior year like a loser. 

And though it may have been a hassle, I had managed to apply for a community college in the area. Sure, it took a lot of meeting with admissions counselors and scramming to complete applications and important paperwork just to get me into the program. But I had come to realize that too much time on my hands would be the unhealthiest choice for me. I needed to get my mind off of the hell that was high school and had to center on my future because I knew that I wanted to do well. I wanted to make my mom and sister proud after being a bitch to both but knew that it was a good idea to stay local just to help them out with anything that they needed.

If anything, it was more painful not being able to experience anything with Jess, Shaun, Florence, and Timothy. It hurt having to sit through the tribute and eulogy and whatever else they had for my deceased friends. If anything, it was just weird to imagine them not being there when they were both so talented, gifted, and unique in their own way. They didn't deserve what happened to them, and I would never forgive fate for doing them so dirty. But I knew that they were resting easy and were watching over me. I loved them. And my love and appreciation for Florence's existence would always hold a special place in my heart. And I was really hoping that she was aware of that in heaven or wherever else she was. As for Timothy, I honestly hoped that he knew that any hatred towards him was nonexistent. Things just come and go, as did my anger and frustration with him.

If anything, the absence of Jess and Shaun might have been the hardest to deal with during the ceremony. We had talked about graduation for years. Hell, it was the name of the favorite album between Shaun and I. And now, I was alone at graduation without them. Who knew where Shaun went. I hadn't seen him since our fight, either at school or in public. I didn't care to look for him in the way that Dinah, Heather, and I had gone to look for Jess. But to me, it didn't matter, and I had decided that it was best for me to just let go and move on. I would never be able to forgive him for hurting Jess in the way that she did.