Jaune Needs To Find His Balls

The Tale of Barney Arc

(Story written in 2016, but republished because the previous site went down.)

Jaune's Missing Balls.

Pyrrha roughly shoved Jaune onto the warm embrace of Beacon's quilt beds.

She heaved herself over his quivering body, purring into his ear with a predatory growl.

Jaune gave a weak sort of chuckle in response, feeling his face grow hot and red.

As Pyrrha gently lowered herself onto her best friend, she bit his ear lovingly.

Jaune gave another weird sort of chuckle and murmured " Are you sure of this, Pyrrha?"

Pyrrha licked his face and said "Oh, i don't know. I better do it now, or who knows Beacon may get attacked by an army of Grimm, and i may get engaged in a huge battle up on Professor Ozpin's blown up office with an evil fire queen who just may happen to be named Cinder, where i will fight bravely with the support of millions of fans but to their despair lose in a gruesome and totally pull the rug from under the fans of a show that may be about us without our knowledge." She said nonchalantly with her head cocked.

"Wow," Jaune grinned under her weight, "that's pretty deep."

"Just like you will be in a few minutes" Pyrrha growled, and she started moving her hips.

What happened next was a blur of moans and a flurry of hasty movements.

Pyrrha's nimble hands swept to Jaune's pants and unbuckled his rather ugly belt.

So far, Jaune had been enjoying this way too much, groaning and moaning at Pyrrha's every touch. But he had harboured a deep secret, that no one else knew, a dark and evil curse that infected every generation of the male Arc, infesting itself in their soul, ruining their lives and crushing their hearts into bleeding shells of trash.

And pleasure and surrounded his brain and drove the thought of the Arc curse straight from his mind.

Pyrrha grinned as he slid her tongue across Jaune's quivering face, leaving trails of her delectable spit behind.

But then it happened.

To Jaune, it was almost like in slow motion.

She pulled down his zipper and shredded his jeans off, before hungrily getting rid of his underwear, only to see...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"HA HA HA HA HA!" Yang Xiao Long chortled with all her might, her beautiful face going red and her arms slamming into the table, her body almost falling off the bench.

Her teammates looked at Jaune and Pyrrha with at least a little more understanding.

Pyrrha said in a disgruntled tone, "It isn't funny, it was bloody scary."

Jaune blushed furiously.

They were at the Beacon cafeteria in the middle of lunch, sitting at a table at the far corner of the gargantuan hall so as to avoid attention.

This was after all, a touchy subject.

"Yeah, Yang? This is a pretty serious matter..." Weiss chided at her blonde teammate.

"Really?" Yang said in a deep, mocking tone, "Well, i guess making fun of it is a ballsy move!"

And with that, she burst back into laughter, tears falling from her eyes.

"So, you just...." Blake murmured, addressing Pyrrha, "pulled off his underwear and saw..."

"Nothing." Pyrrha muttered as Jaune went redder than the reddest ruby. "Absolutely nothing. Just the sausage but no meatballs."