THE MARVEL BUNCH [ avengers imagines ]

SAFE

Bucky Barnes:

I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to save me
This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy
I need somebody to heal
Somebody to know
Somebody to have
Somebody to hold
It's easy to say
But it's never the same
I guess I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain

Bucky startled himself awake, tears springing to his blue eyes as his nightmare brought back memories of his days with HYDRA controlling him. He hated how painful the nightmares were and he hated how you weren't there to ease the pain.

He blamed himself. Of course, he did. He blamed himself for the tears that sprang to your eyes during the argument and he blamed himself for the broken shell of a person you left as. He hadn't intended to harm you, but he didn't quite trust himself to keep you safe.

Now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

You let out a choked sob in the safety of your bedroom and Wanda felt her heart splinter. "I can make this pain stop temporarily, Y/N. Please let me" Wanda pleaded for the fifth time since the breakup but you were persistent.

"I miss him so much, Wanda. God, I can't seem to stop loving him either. Everything hurts and he's not here" you sobbed, finally allowing Wanda to hold you tightly. She didn't say anything, because she knew she wouldn't have the words to make the pain go away.

I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to turn to
This all or nothing way of loving got me sleeping without you
Now, I need somebody to know
Somebody to heal
Somebody to have
Just to know how it feels
It's easy to say but it's never the same
I guess I kinda liked the way you helped me escape

"You need to talk to her, Buck" Steve had told the brunette man one morning over breakfast. Bucky grunted in acknowledgement, staring down his coffee with contempt.

"Wanda told me how troubled Y/N's dreams have been. She's struggling without you, y'know? She misses you. She needs you" Steve was persistent and Bucky just slammed his coffee cup into the sink.

"Will you quit it! I can't keep her safe, especially from me! I did this for her own good" Bucky spat before he stormed back to his bedroom. He normally didn't mind his best friend being such a persistent pain in the ass, but today he just wasn't in the mood.

--

"Wanda? Yeah. I'm in. Let's do it" Steve mumbled down the phone to Wanda one evening and Wanda briefed him on her plans and Steve hummed and encouraged her.

"I still don't know why you're bloody dragging me here, Wandy" you grumbled and Wanda smiled softly.

"Family movie night. We miss having you around, peanut" Tony couldn't help but announce his entrance and you moved to give him a hug. You missed the annoying Stark, and he missed you too.

"Hey, kiddo. We've missed you" Steve ruffled your hair as he walked past with Bucky. You winced as you took a look at Bucky and you knew he hadn't been sleeping. You knew his nightmares had returned but you felt a lump in your throat as he walked away from you.

Five minutes later, you found yourself curled up next to Wanda as Tony put the movie on and you couldn't help but sniff as you stole glances at Bucky.

And I tend to close my eyes when it hurts sometimes
I fall into your arms
I'll be safe in your sound 'til I come back around

You were on the verge of sleep when the movie had finished three hours later, and you could faintly hear someone grunt as they picked you up and socked feet padded through the hallways as the mystery man carried you somewhere.

You landed somewhere soft, and you could faintly smell the detergent and shampoo Bucky used. Lemongrass and clean cotton.

Through sleepy eyes, you could see Bucky moving to leave his room. "Stay" you mumbled, and Bucky emitted a sigh.

"Y/N, I-" he tried but you shushed him. "Please don't go. I can't do this alone anymore" you whimpered and Bucky moved to join you in the bed.

You positioned yourself into the position you always slept in, and Bucky felt happier, and warmer, as the two of you melted into each others touch.

Bucky could hear soft breathing and he knew you were still awake. "What you thinking about, sweet girl?" The nickname slipped out but Bucky wasn't going to attempt to take it back.

"How much I missed this. How much I missed you." came your sleepy reply.

"You don't need to protect me from yourself. I trust you, Buck. I've never once been scared by you. In fact, I feel safer with you around" you whispered, and Bucky felt tears come to his eyes.

You had made Bucky feel safer than he ever had before. You made him feel wanted, and loved and needed. That's all he wanted.

He kissed you that night, and it was like the first kiss all over again. The butterflies and the fireworks.

"Now go to sleep Buck. You look shattered" you mumbled afterwards and Bucky let out a chuckle.

The two of you slept soundly that night.

a/n this was cute to write. someone you loved by Lewis Capaldi was the inspiration behind this complete and utter angsty fluff.