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Chapter 1

I let the warm water from the shower run down my back. Letting it relax my muscles and calm my nerves as I run my fingers through my hair. I just woke up not to long ago for school and quit honestly I didn't wanna go. I have been going through so much lately that has caused me to miss two weeks worth of school which isn't good I know but, mentally I just couldn't do it and today for some reason I got the motivation to go .but as I stand in this shower , underneath the water , I slowly start to regret getting up and my motivation slowly starts to fade. Luckly there is only 4 days left of school so i guess that's good. I decided to stop thinking so much because all these thoughts were hurting my head . I continued finishing up washing my hair along with my body , rinsing all the soap off. I eventually sooner or later got out of the shower , wrapping a towel around my body as I excited into my bedroom. I sat on the bed grabbing my phone to check the time. Its was 5:40 am. I groaned loudly and layed back onto my bed covering my face with my hands . I honestly felt like crying because I knew my life was crumbeling apart but I couldn't fix it . I really wanted to go to school and finish my work and get it all caught up before it ends but my depression makes it to where I really don't have the motivation but my anxiety causes me to worry about it. I decided I would text my friend to update her on what was going on but then I remembered her phone was cut off so I went to go message her on twitter. " Hey Bonnie, I'm sorry I haven't messaged you or been to school lately. I thought I would update you and let you know that I finally ate last night after 2 weeks and got some rest last night finally and that I'm still trying to get things together but, I may be in school today I don't know. I had motivation but it's slowly fadeing. Anyways just thought I'd update you cause I know you worry about me , much love." I sent before locking my phone and sighing. I didn't wanna go but I knew I had too . It's better than sitting at home and thinking to much. I finally got out of the bed seeing as it was now 6:20am and I had to leave the house by 6:35. I walked over to my dresser and pulled out a white t-shirt and some black jeans with rips in the knees. I didn't feel like dressing up too fancy I mean it's just school. I put on my jeans which hugged my legs nicely and slipped on my shirt rolling up the sleeves a little and put on a black belt to keep my pants up before I put on my socks and my hightop black vans . after tieing my shoes I huffed and stood up brushing my hair deciding to just let it air dry and show my natural curls. I picked up my phone and saw it was 6:30. I unlocked it only to see it was still on twitter. I went ahead and texted Bonnie saying that I was actually going to school and I hope to see her . She never texted back which is unusual for her but I just shrugged my shoulders figuring she was just busy this morning and couldn't respond back. I quickly grabbed my back pack and rushed out the door running towards school. I lived right down the street so it's not too far of a walk. I finally got there and walked into the school doors deciding I would head to the cafeteria and get an apple before heading to class cause we have 5 minutes before we have to official go Plus, I needed to atleast eat something today. "Hey , oh my goodness Y/N ." you heard someone say before turning around only to see Bonnie running towards me embracing me in a big hug. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming to school today or updating me on everything." She practically yelled as she let go of me as she playfully punched my arm . I chuckled and rubbed my arm where she hit it and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion . I swear I texted her this morning. I love how over protective she was and how much she cared for me . we have been friends since 5th grade. I love her so much words could never describe . " I swear I messaged you on twitter this morning after i got out of the shower." I said kinda confused. She furrowed her eyebrows and pulled out her phone and shrugged her shoulders before showing me her phone. " I didnt get any messages or notifications." She said with a puzzled look on her face. I just shrugged my shoulders. "Hmm maybe they just didnt send. I'll message them to you agian later." I said to her before the bell rang signaling for us to head to class. "Well I'll see you at lunch." Bonnie said giving me a kind smile before heading to class. I sighed and decided to head to class too.