S1 E3: Girl Meets Maya's First Kiss

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*later, at school*

"I was so worried about this new school year. New school, new people, I didn't think I was going to survive. Not only am I surviving, I'm thriving. I'm like a plant going like this" she does an awkward pose, typical Riley.
"What was I so worried about?"  Oh no! I look into the classroom and see a girl, Missy Bradford flirting with Lucas, what do I do?! Not enough time to think! I cover my best friend's eyes
"What are you doing? Oh, this is too easy. It's Maya. I know because I saw you put your hand over my face. I'll do you now" she covers my eyes.
"Oh, that's not the game"
"What's the game?"
"The game is protect the plant from the bulldozer in the pink sweater" I gotta protect her innocence at every cost.
R"Oh, Maya, bulldozers don't wear pink" oh no, she looks into the classroom and sees them flirting
"Huh" Damn it.
"You okay?"
"Yeah" Nope, she's not she's sliding down until she's sitting and I join her
"Oh, look what the bulldozer did to you"
"There are other girls, in this world"
"There are"
"And other girls, like Missy Bradford, are going to talk to Lucas"
"They are"
"I don't like that"
"I know" my poor baby is feeling jealousy for the first time, just like me. I don't like that girl either and before you say it: yes, I do have a little tiny crush for him but I feel like the truly deserves better than me or that Missy, he is perfect for Riley.
"I wish the world was just me and you"
"Then it is" we go inside and the lesson finally starts.
"Sneak attack. December 7th, 1941"
"A date which will live in infamy"
"A date? They're going on a date? In Italy?" Oh honey
"No, honey. You're in History"
"I'm history?"
"Okay, put your hand up" I lift Riley's arm
"Yes, Riley? You have a pertinent observation on the subject of the sneak attack?"
"May I be excused?" I say to encourage her to talk
"My eyes see my shoes" I point at Missy and Lucas
"Yes, Riley, you may be excused"
"Forever?"
"No, you have to come back to class at some point, honey. You just have to" she somehow manages to exit without falling on the ground or something similar
"It was another sunny day in paradise, before the sneak attack that changed everything"
Oh! Another embarrassing moment is about to happen very soon since Riles is peeking out from the window, spying on Missy and Lucas.
"Do you like the movies? Dark at the movies"
"Depends on the movie. Depends who I'm going with"
"Scary movies? I get scared at scary movies. You'll take care of me though, right?" Ugh, disgusting, I just wanna throw up from the cringe of this dialogue. Seems like my partner in crime agrees with me, she looks like she's about to explode
"People who had viewed themselves as safe, no longer had any security at all"
"Just you and me, Missy?"
"Just you and me, Lucas" Missy taps Lucas's nose
"Boop"
"Boop? That's the best you got?" this is about to go down!
"Please be cool, please be cool, please be cool" I say more for myself, I can't blame her, I feel like her, I just have more control over my actions.
"You don't think that I can do boop?"
"How bad do you think this is gonna be?" I ask Farkle
"I think we should have some faith in our Riley"
"I can do boop like you've never seen. Boop!" there are no words to express what I'm seeing.
"Does anybody see this?" why is her still finger in his nose?!
"Everybody sees this"
"Take your finger out!" I order
"Can't. Can't move. Scared. Do you think Lucas knows?" I'm just gonna answer to this question as truthfully as I can
"Riley, I've never seen anything like this before, I don't know what's gonna happen"
"Farkle?"
"Boy, Riley. I don't think I could do that even if I tried" he stands up
"Hey, Maya, boop. Oh no" I'm gonna kill him after this.
"The bombing of Pearl Harbor was our official entrance into a world at war, and nothing would ever be the same"

*at lunchtime*

"You want me to bring you lunch?" I hate seeing her this upset, it makes me feel sad, more than usual.
"No. Food would only keep me alive"
"Come on, little plant, come back into the sun"
"I'm afraid something terrible will happen if I ever come out of here"
"Riley, that's crazy. Nothing could be worse than what's already happened" Never mind, Missy walks up to us
"Oh, there you are. I've been looking for you. You're not upset with me, are you? Because I didn't hear that you and Lucas were together or anything"
"We're not"
"Hmm, yeah, that's what I thought. So if you're not, then it's not a problem if I ask Lucas out, because he's really cute. Don't you think?" Is she really doing what I think she's doing? I take this as a personal attack
"I loathe you"
"Well, Lucas doesn't. In fact, I think he's kind of into me. Shocker" What a...
"I live here now"

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