Attachments

Chapter 23

Honest confession – I had absolutely no idea and understanding about the feelings Vaish's heart bore for Darshan...who wasn't exactly a happening part of her life. How did she feel something so strongly for someone, when an unmovable distance always existed between them? How did she 'miss' him and how come she never ran out of love, despite the distance and differences? I had questions, but I was aware that Vaish wasn't in that state of mind to lend me an answer and I decided to let go. Eventually, no matter how weird and out-of-the-box it was; it was her love for him and I had absolutely no rights to question, judge or doubt it for it definitely was one of the purest and most genuine form of love. It was a tree only she watered, and kept alive; one-sided love had its own beauty. Mom once said that, 'God loves His children the same. Fair-skinned or dark-skinned; heterosexual or homosexual; rich or poor – it does not matter to Him. Differences in class, standards and gender does not exist for Him; He loves all of us the same. When God does not discriminate and judge in love, who are we to question and judge one's love for someone? The world has complicated everything, but love is simple, let's keep it that way; love is love, that's it'. As I recalled her words, my heart began aching for the warmth in her hug; it had been exactly two days since I last talked to my mom, because she was caught up in a family function and I terribly missed her that night!

"I cannot change my fucked up destiny, chuck that!", Vaish said in a lighter tone, and breathed out loudly. "I should go and sleep; I have an early day tomorrow", she rose to her feet and tied her hair into a top-knot bun. "Good night", I smiled at her, still sitting on the rugged carpet, and she walked back into the bedroom, stranding me all alone in the empty living room. I reached out for my handbag, fished my iPhone out of my handbag and dialed my mom's number; I was beyond sure that she would yell at me for calling her up at some 2 a.m. at night, but I couldn't handle the feeling that consumed my insides. I listened to the silence that echoed on line, once she answered the call.

"What happened, Dityaa? What happened to you?", as expected from her, she blurted out in an extremely panicky tone, and dramatically gasped for breath. "Wh—where, where are you? You're at home, right? You're safe, right? Where are you, Dityaa! Say something?", my mom scolded. "Maa", I called out, calmly, and smiled, tilting my head to the side. "I'm at home. Nothing happened. I was missing you, and I thought of calling you up, that's all", I answered all her questions at once. "Stupid girl", mom breathed out in relief, and I giggled. "Is this the time to call someone? You know my blood pressure shoots when I'm stressed; my veins would have burst and I would have died in a few minutes!", she scolded. No DNA tests were required to prove that I was her kid; the way we dramatized every little thing was enough proof! "Who told you to take stress?", I questioned, studying my nails. "You're in Mumbai. What if something happened to you? It is an extremely unsafe city, and you're calling at 2 a.m.; I thought something extremely bad happened to you. Why do you want to live there? What's there in Mumbai, that's not in Surat? I've been losing my sleep every other night, worrying about you and your safety in that unknown city. God knows how I'm still alive. Just come back, Dityaa", mom started off, again. "Maa!", I whined, shaking my head to the sides. "We had this conversation long back, didn't we? I am sick of living in Surat; waking up in the same room, visiting the same place and meeting the same old people...God, that's so boring. Everyone needs a change!", I repeated. "One day, you'll grow tired of Mumbai, too; then, what will you do?", she questioned. "I'll leave India!", I casually answered, and shrugged my shoulders. "I'll throw my broomstick at you!", mom warned and I giggled. "You can throw whatever you want at me, but I made up my mind – I want to work in a foreign country, after some time, And then I'll come back to India to build my foundation! And, and...and if you don't let me go, I'll run away from India. Think about it", I said. "Run away and don't come back home. My daughter will be dead for me the day you run away, and I'll die because of a heart attack. What will people say! Shame!", my mom spat. "What will people say?", I tried to take a dig. "They're already saying so much. All the girls in our society, who are of your age, are getting married and they're having babies. Yesterday, Vanita Ji visited our house, with a wedding card; her daughter is getting married to a big businessman in Delhi. Her daughter hasn't studied too much, and in her destiny, a businessman's written. You are way smarter than her and you have achieved ten times more than...no, no, fifty times more than that girl – a multi-millionaire company's owner will marry you. Just give a word of approval for your marriage, and look what happens!", mom blabbered the dialogue, which belonged to every other Indian mother. "Exactly, I am way smarter than that girl, so...I'll be a businesswoman. Thank you for the compensation offer, but no thanks, mom", I rolled my eyes. "What rubbish", my mom muttered under her breath. "Oh, I'm speaking rubbish?! Are you serious, Maa?! I schooled for fourteen mad-long years, sacrificed everything for the sake of my studies, and somehow managed to complete a Management Course, despite the financial struggles we were going through; and you're going to use all my achievements to buy a groom for me? Had I known that this was written in my destiny, I wouldn't have worked hard at all; I would have simply sat at home and waited until I was old enough to get married. It may be cool to be a businessman's wife, but I want to hold pride in being a businesswoman, myself, and I am not going to settle down for anything less, that's all", I lectured my mom. "Come and say this to the people in our society. All the ladies are laughing at me and they're talking about me behind my back. They think there's some problem with you, and that's why you're unmarried yet", like a little kid, my mom complained. "Please tell them to shut up and fuck off!", I snapped. "I have told you not to swear!", my mom scolded. "You're putting the words in my mouth!", I scolded back and we fell silent.