Strings Attached

~Chapter 15~

So... why would she spread that video of us in the whole school? Wouldn't that be an insult to her? Wouldn't that decrease her popularity? Deem her a reject?! Make her a laughing stock?!

All this while, I was thinking she'd captured that video to spread it to the school. And the shame that I was to carry after that was gnawing at my insides, preventing me from leaving the room.

As if somehow, I'd be able to lessen the degree of contempt I was to be subjected to by refusing to face the world. As if!

But I know now, she won't be using that against me. If she wants to maintain the bevy of devout followers she has. And she wouldn't want to lose that, I'm sure. She revels in popularity, that's a fact.

The thought brings a huge relief to me. It's like a weight lifted off my chest. But I've yet to make up with my Allaah SWT and I don't want to delay that. And I join my hands together in prayer, lifting them a little to the heavens, asking for forgiveness.

I make promises. Lots of them. Being good to Hiba is one of them, but I'm not sure if I'll be able to keep it. The next time I see her, which is inevitable, I'll just look at her, recall her naked, and scurry out of her presence. I'm afraid of Hiba and her conniving brain.

It's sad, but that's how it is. I also make a promise to tell everything to dadi very soon. And I promise to stick to the truth, come what may. I was not in the wrong anyway.

I wonder how Hiba doesn't feel dirty. Maybe this is all very common for her. But with a dad like hers, I doubt she ever gets away with much. Maybe she too was drunk. She had a day full of practically no supervision from anyone. And it makes logical sense.

The thought chills me to the core, and I lift my hands once again, this time to pray for the good of my nemesis. She may be wild, but she isn't bad. Besides, she is a Muslim. And I ought to pray for her.

After making du'a for a long while, I gather all courage inside me and tiptoe downstairs to the kitchen in order to snag some food for my starving stomach. Thankfully, I don't meet anyone on the way there. But when I turn to leave, I'm taken aback to find Hiba near the door, grinning diabolically at me.

"Hope you enjoy your last two meals before execution," she says self assuredly, completely in her element. I'm so unhinged at her abrupt appearance that I'm not able to move a muscle. And then she drops a strange-sounding riddle on me.

By the time she leaves, I'm left with a sense of foreboding and all other senses in a limbo.

_____

Nightfall is no different, but my brain has begun to live with what has happened. My senses are nothing but benumbed now and yesterday seems a thing of a distant past. Almost a fable, or a dream.

Though I know, reality doesn't follow my train of thought. But I guess it's a coping mechanism. Whatever it may be, I really need it if I have to get out of this vortex by the end of the week. Today's Tuesday, I'll need to call in sick and excuse myself to the school at least till Friday. I can't face anyone yet.

Hiba's words have been nagging me though. What does she mean by execution? Will I be expelled from school? From this house? No..no! Uncle Jabbar would never do that to me! He is dad's friend, surely he would believe me...? However, I remain apprehensive for the rest of the day.

Long story short, when Uncle Jabbar and his wife come home that night, I'm immediately called upon to report. Although I don't think that's to be the subject of our conversation. I go to him, resigned that my judgement will be pronounced the moment I reach the threshold of the looming library.