The Sword and the Scythe

Chapter 2: I Still Miss Someone

She looked down at her clasped hands in her lap. Her mother hadn't wanted her. It was a difficult realization. But she looked up at her father's kind eyes. She didn't doubt thatheloved her. For as long as she could remember, he'd tried to be both father and mother. The feeling that something was missing was a recent one.

Holly bit her lip. "What was she like?"

"You mother was well-read, worldly, and fun. Her laugh was infectious—it was like music and there was little I wouldn't do to get another laugh from her. You've got her blonde hair and her soft features. She was the one who wanted to name you Holly. I wanted to name you Charlotte, but she fought hard and Holly it was. I didn't have the heart to change it after she left."

She rolled her eyes. "I wish you had; I like that better." She wasn't sure she wanted a name picked out by someone who could abandon their own kid like that.

Her dad laughed and patted her knee as he started to go back to his book.

"What was her name?"

"Ginny." Holly thought this over in silence, trying to create a mental image of the woman. "I know it's a lot to take in. Why don't we go out to dinner tonight? The diner? Or should we be fancy and go into the city?"

"The diner is fine."

"Well, if we go into the city, we can go window shopping too and beef up your list before Christmas. What d'ya think?" He smiled like the trip to the city was the equivalent of going to Disney World. But it worked; his enthusiasm was infectious as usual.

Holly smiled and got dressed, grabbing her coat and a wool beanie. Her dad tucked the ragged black notebook he carried everywhere with him back into his pocket. They crawled into her dad's ancient Range Rover and headed into the city.

They ate an early dinner at an Applebee's off the interstate. After that they went to the mall, laughing at all the Christmas decorations out even though it wasn't even Thanksgiving yet. Her dad bought a few books from the bookstore by the food court—he could never resist a book sale. They got a bit lost inside the mall on their way out, trying to find the store they'd come in through. Even when they found the right department store, they still had to circle around to look for the right exit. As they wandered around the jewelry department looking for signs of anything they had seen on the way in, a gold locket caught Holly's eye. It was on a long chain, and there was small diamond on the front.

She felt like she'd been looking at it too long, so she turned back to follow her dad. When she turned back around, she could tell he'd seen the longing look on her face.

He smiled at her, "I think we should take that home with us. Call it an early Christmas present."

"It's okay. You don't have to do that."

But he'd already flagged down the woman behind the counter and handed her his credit card.

Once they got outside, he pulled the locket out of the small box and helped Holly put it on. "I know a fun day in the city can't fix what I told you today. But I need you to know how much I wanted you in my life. Every time you look at this necklace, I want you to remember that you are the single best thing that ever happened to me. Before I was your dad, I was floundering. You gave my life purpose. It was only after I had you and moved back to my hometown that I got the job at the university. I don't know where I'd be without you."

They took a few more steps out to the car.

He breathed in a big sigh and continued, "I used to have this friend who would say that everyone faces heartbreaks in life. What reflects on your character is not what breaks your heart or even how often, but how you recover from it." He put his hand on her shoulder and sighed. "Believe me, I know it's hard to think about. But what she did has no reflection on you. And I know that it's not fair for you to have to deal with this, but if you can learn how to get past it, it'll make you a stronger person. And then maybe something good can come from the heartbreak after all."