Manor of Convenience

The Party

"That's another thing, Toby. I saw someone bent over the bushes outside, thought it was you. Got closer and closer for a pinch and found Meg doing the gardening. Really, girls shouldn't wear trousers like us chaps."

"You're not wearing trousers!"

It was at that moment the aforementioned Meg burst through the door, singing, causing George to stagger to the bed and fall upon it.

"Hello Meg," he said, trying to get his breath back as like a tortoise he lay on his back, flailing, unable to get back up again.

"Hello George," she said, not looking at him. "I'm looking for my earrings, think I left them lying around somewhere in here."

"Oh Meg, you really ought to tidy things away," I said.

"Well, it's hard having two bedrooms. I can't keep track."

There was a little knock at the door. "Hello, everyone decent?"

"No, but come anyway," George said.

Sophia entered a second later looking marvellous in an emerald green dress that displayed her fine back and was decorated so she looked like a glorious peacock. She wore a matching peacock feathered headband over her strawberry blonde curls.

"There you three are," she said, "as usual I'm the only one ready."

"I'm ready too!" I protested.

She straightened my bowtie. "Alright, now you're presentable."

"Oh George, really!" Meg said, tutting at him as she finally looked at her husband. She folded her arms. "Why are you not wearing trousers?"

"Because people keep interru-

"-put them on! I absolutely refuse to enter a room with a man wearing no trousers."

"Don't bully him, Meg," I said, pinching her, "you're also not ready. Your dress isn't even done up and your hair is messy."

"I'm trying to find my earrings."

"Here they are," Sophia said, taking them off the dressing table. She grabbed Meg's hand, sighed and pulled her behind the dressing screen. "Let me adjust you, you beautiful doll."

I laughed as I saw their heads peeking over the top of the screen and as I glanced quickly, they were a mass of arms. Then I observed that Meg, like I had with George, placed a little kiss on the top of Sophia's freckled nose. I spun back around to my own love and to no surprise there he was, still trouser-less, causally and slowly reaching for the coat hanger that held his trousers but which for George may as well have held prison overalls.

Finally, he placed them on and the ladies appeared from behind the screen making final adjustments to each other. All four of us stood together in front of the mirror.

"There," Sophia said, "don't we all look fine."

"I suppose so," Meg replied, shuffling and adjusting her dress under the ribcage and touching her own bosom.

"I don't feel fine," George added.

"Talk to me when you're wearing a corset!" Meg, still fiddling with her dress, snapped back.

"As a matter of fact," he began in protest but I placed my finger on his lips. That was a story for another time.

"No time for squabbles. The guests will be here soon. Have we forgotten anything? Oh god, what if we've forgotten something?" I said.

"Everything is under control, there's no need to panic. When the road ahead seems perilous, Sophia is here to guide us along to the other side."

I always had to laugh whenever Sophia referred to herself in the third person.