Unrequited love

six

Who was I, to think that there was injustice in my life? Who was I to think that I have problems when, truth to be told, I had no right to think that way, since I had minimalistic problems compared to what others were going through. I was no one and nothing awful happened to me. 

"you know, Lizzy, everyone has their own problems and there's nothing wrong with that. No one has bigger issues than others. And no one should feel pathetic because of feeling bad because their whole world is crushing down. Keep that in mind next time you tell me that crying is for the weak. You can cry and that's okay." 

Mother's words went through my mind when I walked down the street, and I felt so sad for an unknown reason. I know that my mum always said I shouldn't feel pathetic, but how couldn't I, there were people starving and living in poverty and I was here feeling sorry for myself because of what? Missing someone? Fuck that.

Marina's house was ahead of me so I rang the bell, greeting Marina as she opened the door. 

"Lizzy! I'm so excited for tonight, I met someone and you'll meet him today. I REALLY hope you like him because he's a sweet heart." she sounded so happy, and I couldn't ruin that for her with my mood swings so I winked at her making her cheeks flush to red.

"so you're going out with him or?" she pulled me inside and I followed her into the living her, not expecting muffins on the table.

"uh muffins." I tried to look more excited to see them than I actually was. I glanced at the clock, realising it was already 7 pm, way over my eating schedule. Marina baking muffins meant I'll have to eat them if I stay at her place, which means that I'll have to find another place to stay at, which means I'll have to stay at Matty's. "I want us to have some fun." I guess he'll be glad to see me.

"Yeah I made them because I was so excited. I mean he like asked me out and oh my god it was so cute, I'm so thrilled. His name is Adam by the way. I met him in the university." she went to the kitchen asking me if I wanted something to drink. I said yes. "well, when are you going out?" 

"uh, you see, today actually, we're going to Downtown and well, I thought that maybe you could meet him and then well, I don't wanna be rude or anything but I'd like some time with him alone? You can still sleepover though. Mum will be home earlier today though because she's sick and she's closing the bar earlier. Whilst dad went to another trip with his job. Doesn't matter." she shrugged with her shoulders. "Don't worry about me, yesterday Matty.." she ran to me. "Matty who? you never told me about a Matty?" her comment made me chuckle. "that's the man in black. I finally know his name. so I wanted to tell you that he said we'll probably meet today, so I guess it's settled then? You with Adam and me with Matty?" she nodded her head and had this huge smile on her face. I was happy for her, trully happy. She always told me how boys don't like her as much as they do me and seeing her being all ecstatic made me happy as well. "eat some muffins, they're delicious." I looked at my thighs and at the clock and back to the muffins, then Marina saw my hesitation and shook her head vigorously. 

"if you want to get drunk, you'll need some food. You know how it was last summer. Seeing you in the hospital wasn't fun darling." I sighed at the memories of the last summer and how I got so drunk that I passed out. Actually, I haven't drunk that much but I didn't eat before I went out and apparently that is bad. "Don't bring that up, please." she shook her haid again. "No, eat. I beg you. They're your favourites."  I muttered something like 'fine ugh' and took one muffin from the plate placed infront of me.

"okay so, what are you wearing?" I asked her when I ate the muffin. Fortunately muffins were small.

"oh, you know that black dress I have? well, yeah, that one." I nodded. "and shoes?"