Perspicuous (J.HALE)

22

It wasn't really a funeral. 

Meg, Elliot and I stood on the cliff edge on the coastal path near the house and scattered the ashes, watching as the grey cloud drifted down onto the waves below. The sky and sea were fittingly gloomy, roiling greys and blues tumbling over one another beneath the surface as white froth fizzed above them. 

It was nice. 

I didn't think I would ever describe a funeral as nice, but there wasn't anything else that fit. It felt appropriate, for closure, but I was still detached. I didn't cry - none of us did. My mum was a difficult woman to love, but we did; just in a complicated way. 

Elliot held my hand, though. I'd always thought him to be a little allergic to physical contact, but he voluntarily took my hand in his and squeezed it as the salt breeze took the ashes down toward the water.

I drove all my things over to the Cullen house that afternoon. 

"Do you need anything else?"

I chewed on my thumbnail, shaking my head despite her not being able to see me. "No, it's okay. I'll just pop back to the house if I've forgotten something."

"Okay, honey."

I pressed the phone against my cheek. "I just feel bad, imposing. Especially right now."

"They wouldn't have offered if they didn't mean it," Meg replied.

I took a deep breath. "I know."

"How's Bella?"

"I've never seen anyone look worse."

There was a pause.

"And there's nothing Carlisle can do?"

"He's trying his best, but..." I trailed off, licking my lower lip. "We haven't found anything."

Her sigh was tired, the energy she'd regained for a few days seeming to dissipate in a single exhale.

"I've spoken to Emily."

I swallowed.

"She was in shock. Otherwise, she would have-

"It's not her I have an issue with," I said. "It's them."

"They genuinely believe that they're doing what's right."

"I don't care," I said simply. "It's still murder."

"You are right."

I glanced at the door as it softly clicked open and Jasper slipped into the room, shutting it quietly behind him.

"I best go, Meg," I said. "I'll call tomorrow."

"Okay, sweetheart," she said. "Give Ethan a kiss for me."

I smiled a little. "I will."

I hung up and immediately deflated, dropping down onto the couch and rubbing my eyes. "Sorry, I just needed somewhere quiet to call her and your room seemed like-

"It's fine," he interrupted. "Don't worry."

He was watching me, eyes black and skin sallow. We stared at one another for a few moments, noting the exhaustion and anxiety reflected in the other's face, before both offering a small, sardonic smile. He moved toward me and settled on the couch, pulling me into his chest. A wave of calm washed over my head, trickling down from the crown of my skull to the base of my heels, and I let out a sigh.