Sweet Iced Tea

Chapter 31

Tuesday, October 21st

I'm starting to feel drowsy, riding in this truck with Josh's dad driving. Even though I don't like to sleep in vehicles, I almost can't help myself. Between the gentle vibration of the motor and Joshua's body heat, I really want to fall asleep.
He is snoring softly into my ear, laying against me with all of his weight on my shoulder. I shift my body slightly and rest my head against his, closing my eyes briefly. His skin is so soft, his breathing so regular, his heartbeat so soothing, I can't see how anything could possibly be wrong. He is too perfect for it to be true. 
Why? 
In the back of my mind though, I can hear his heartbeat, weak and irregular, like a disc when it's skipping. Thump. Thump. Thu-thump. Over and over again, the only noise I have discovered, beside Erik's voice, that makes me shaky with fear.
I nestle my head deeper into his shoulder, savoring all the closeness I have for the time being. When we get to the clinic he'll be harder to reach.
"Mr Hart?" I ask Josh's dad quietly.
"Yes, Leah?"
"Will we all be okay?" My eyelids are getting heavier by the minute.
"I hope so."
Even though that isn't my idea of a good answer, I just shut up and relax, listening to every breath Josh takes, watching his chest rise and fall in a comfortably repetitive manner.
"Do you think everything will be okay, Leah? Or are you just riding on hope too?" His deep voice rumbles out.
"What else can I really do?" I counter, sounding more terse than I really wanted to. "I don't know what to do, there is nothing that I can do- God, I want it to all be the way it was last week. I just want everything to turn out."
Even though I don't look, I'm sure he nods. "We all do." He repeats it quieter, to himself. "We all do."
I look out the window. The light in the sky is slowly creeping away, making my view through the dark tinted windows even dimmer. We have an hour or so until we're in Tulsa.
I pull myself partially into Josh's lap, and straighten so that my lips are close to his ear. "You know I love you, Joshua Gene Hart, and you had better, for the sake of everyone, be perfectly fine." I wrap my arms around him and bury my face into the place where his neck meets his shoulder, whispering still. "You had better be okay, Joshua."
♡}¤{♡
"Leah, sweetie." I am prodded gently. "Wake up, baby. We're here."
My hammock is strangely warm-wait-hammock? How the-what?
"Joshua?" I open my eyes, trying to bring the lights in the near distance into focus. "What-how?"
"If you try to say I shouldn't be carrying you, it's going to make me mad." he tightens his hold around my waist, walking a little faster.
"Why-"
"Don't say anything." he says quickly. "I'm going to hear it from the doctor, I don't need to hear it from you."
"This is why Dr Reimer wanted to ride with us. He knew you'd do something stupid." I murmur lazily into his chest. "Why didn't your dad stop you?"
He chuckles lightly. "Dad went to get a stretcher. He'll be surprised to see that I've already got you."
"Why on earth would he get a stretcher?"
"You haven't slept more than five hours in the last two days. He didn't really want to wake you up."
I snort. "You woke me up."
"I can't really kiss you when you're asleep, can I?" He stops walking.
"Sneaky." I grumble.
"I haven't kissed you in four days." I can see something in his eyes, something that I also can feel. Longing. He's missed things being normal, even though it hasn't been but a few days.
"You missed me?" I laugh lightly, but sincerely.
"I always do. You're my best friend, Leah. You haven't been yourself lately."
It's true, truer than I care to admit. "You're my best friend too, Mr Hart." I can feel crying in my near future. This is all too much. 
He leans in and kisses me suddenly, an answer to my thick declaration. His lips move in sync to the racing off my heart, urgency evident in every movement he makes. My arms find their way around his neck and my fingers weave into his hair, while he pushes me against the side of a nearby car, his lips moving so fast that I struggle to keep up. 
"Joshua," I sob between kisses. "Joshua."
"Ssh..." 
He kisses me again, easier and not as frenzied, both of us breathing irregularly. The car door's handle digs into my back as he pushes me further. 
"Joshua, please stop."
He trails a few kisses up my neck. "I don't want to."
"You have to." 
He pulls back, letting my feet touch the ground. "I want to kiss you again."
I blink quickly and wipe a few tears away. "Your dad is going to come to find us eventually, and I'd prefer if he didn't catch us making out."
"I wouldn't care."
"Really, we need to go."
"Leah..."
"Come on." I take his arm and we start to walk toward the clinic's entrance, even though I would have liked nothing better than to get in the truck and drive away from here as fast as possible.